


Camp Patience

by furbies



Category: GOT7
Genre: Camping, Fluff, M/M, Outdoor Sex, Smut, eventually, like late 20s, lots of kpop idols with minor roles, past homophobia, past mark/jinyoung, team building activities, youngjae is a bit older, yugyeom and mark friendship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-24
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-05-15 22:40:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 35,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5803102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/furbies/pseuds/furbies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mark hates his job after becoming infamous at his workplace without even trying.</p><p>Jackson is the boss's favorite employee, hard working, loyal and displaying an unnesecary amount of devotion to the company.</p><p>Youngjae is the boss. He is well meaning but easily swindled by every new management trend and fad. Which is what lead to the employees of the Geode Electricity customer service center going on the worst team building camp that anybody has ever seen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

News travels fast. Which is something that Mark Tuan knew all too well. It was a small thing really, when Mark slept with his coworker Jinyoung. He never expected how much it would change things. Not between him and Jinyoung, that in itself was relatively uncomplicated. It was just a casual hookup after all. However, going to work at Geode Electricity would never be the same.

He couldn't blame Jinyoung, he never saw it coming either. But when Jinyoung innocently told his friend about their encounter, about how he would have never expected such a thing from quiet reserved Mark. About how Mark had told him that such things weren't so out of the ordinary for him. Jinyoung also went into some more explicit detail, but that doesn't need to be mentioned. Well, it just spread like wildfire from there. It was like everybody just suddenly knew.

The way that everybody at the office behaved around them was never the same after that. Which seemed like it was harder for Jinyoung to deal with than it was for Mark. Mark was used to keeping to himself. Yeah, he liked having friends at work. But it wasn't a necessity for him like it was for some people. He just wanted to be able to do his job, get paid and go home in peace.

People weren't vicious, outside of a few hurtful comments, but they kept their distance. It was like simultaneously being the most invisible and the most visible person in the room. Always talked about, but never talked to. The few who were hateful didn't make it overtly obvious and those who weren't necessarily prejudiced just wanted to avoid the controversy. Or wanted to avoid the assumptions others would make if they saw them hanging out with him.

Luckily for Mark, Yugyeom liked people who were a bit controversial. Just as Mark had gotten used to sitting alone and not speaking to his coworkers, Yugyeom sat down at the computer next to him. Then he proceeded to sit himself down next to Mark every day after that. Yugyeom was a fair bit younger than Mark, which did show sometimes. Especially in the things that he would do to entertain himself if he got bored. This could range from flicking his pen on the desk annoyingly, to putting a tablespoon of salt in somebody's coffee while they were away from their computer. He was that rare kind of loveable person who could get away with stuff like that. Probably partly because he was the youngest employee, the baby of the team.

The gossip resulted in the most uncomfortable meeting with the boss of their young lives. Youngjae had requested that Mark and Jinyoung come see him in his office. The fact that he had requested the two of them together gave them a pretty good clue as to what it would be about. Mark was filled with dread, he assumed Jinyoung was the same.

Youngjae was a fairly good man. He didn't judge or discriminate against them. But he was also trying to be a good manager. He saw the way that people's reactions to what the Mark and Jinyoung had done had created an unhappy work environment for the pair and had effectively alienated them from the rest of the team. He wanted to assure them that he would bring an end to people excluding them. He also wanted to assure them, somewhat naively, that they were part of an awesome team. Mark tried to resist the urge to roll his eyes. Then Youngjae told them that he had decided on a new rule that he would soon be informing everybody of. No romance between colleagues, even outside of work. It wasn't to punish anybody, it was to protect them, he explained.

Jinyoung left two days later. He told Mark that the situation just wasn't worth it to him. He couldn't handle going to work and feeling like everybody was watching him

Youngjae was a man of his word and Mark did notice people gradually acting better towards him. The employees who were outwardly rude to Mark seemed to stop coming to work, he didn't ask why. Or maybe he was just becoming old news and people didn't care anymore. Not that he himself cared anymore either, he just stuck by Yugyeom and maintained a civil relationship with the others. Work was a place for working.

 

 

"So, I'm just bringing up your details now.. It looks like the money that was deducted from your account was due to the payment plan that you agreed to to cover the overdue bill.. I can explain if you.. Yes, I'm trying explain that the.. It says on our system that you agreed to a payment plan.. No I wo.. No I wouldn't lie to you sir.. Yes this is definitely Geode Electricity.. He would just.. I understand that sir and you can talk to him if you like but he'll just tell you the same thing I'm telling you.. That's tota.. That's totally fine Sir, I'll just transfer you through to him, please hold". Mark couldn't slam the hold button fast enough. He noticed that Yugyeom was making a face at him, but was quickly interrupted by receiving a customer of his own.

Mark entered the code into the phone to dial his manager Youngjae. He adjusted his headset while it rang with that annoying dial tone that had become far too familiar.

" Hello, Youngjae's phone, how can I help you Mark?". Mark was confused by the unexpected voice at the other end.

".. Who's this? Where's Youngjae?" He asked.

"This is Jackson, Youngjae had to get something from his car so put me in charge while he's gone. What can I help you with?" Jackson said with a friendly but professional manner.

"Oh I just.. I've got this customer who wasn't expecting the deduction from their payment plan and they really want to talk to the manager" Mark explained.

There was a minor pause before Jackson said "Ok, put them through to me".

".. but you aren't the manager, won't Youngjae be back soon?" Mark said hesitantly.

"I'm the manager while he's gone, it's like-" He was interrupted by Youngjae entering the room with a large folder and placing it on the desk. "Youngjae's back, I'll let him know" Jackson said dissapointedly before dissapearing from the line for a minute then being replaced by the boss.

"That's fine Mark, transfer them through" Said Youngjae after Jackson explained the gist to him.

"Thank you". Mark hit the transfer button and just like that, the customer was gone.

Mark waited until Yugyeom was finished with his customer then got his attention. "It's pretty funny, Jackson was playing manager while Youngjae was getting something from his car".

" What.. how?" Asked Yugyeom curiously, looking back toward the sectioned off area of the office that contained Youngjae and often Jackson too. The bottom of the dividing wall was solid and the top half was clear plastic, so you could still kind of see them.

"He answered Youngjae's phone and was trying to get me to transfer a customer who wanted the manager through to him" Mark explained.

"That'd be like.. his dream".

" Yeah, but then Youngjae came back right before I could put the customer through to him" Mark told him. Yugyeom laughed abruptly.

"Oh no" He said sympathetically through giggles, feeling slightly sorry for him. "That's so sad.. You took his dream from him Mark".

Mark just kind of shook his head with a slight smile, then got back to work. They didn't want anybody to notice they were distracting each other.

Neither of them necessarily disliked Jackson. In fact he was pretty universally liked around the office. But certain aspects of him kind of irked Mark. They liked to joke about it sometimes.

 

 

They kept working until that evening, when a message unexpectedly appeared on everybody's computer screen. It told them to finish up what they were doing, log off their phones and report to the manager's section for a team meeting. Nobody knew what was going on, but obeyed nonetheless.

Gradually every employee gathered at the manager's section and were chattering about what this could possibly be about. Even Jackson said he didn't know, which was a surprise.

"Is that everybody?" Asked Youngjae, looking around. There didn't seem to be anybody left at the computers. He looked back and noticed the uneasy faces of his employees. "Hey, don't worry guys, it's nothing bad" He reassured with a smile. Many members of the team probably breathed a sigh of releif like Mark did. "So, as you know, i'm really proud have the chance to lead such a great team. Each and every one of you plays a vital role to this company and as a manager, it's my responsibility to do anything in my power to help all of you be the best you can be". He fumbled through the folder he was holding to pull out a stack of papers. "That's why I have some really exciting news".

Mark groaned, but only loud enough that Yugyeom noticed. "I know.." Yugyeom agreed. Mark had been working for Youngjae long enough to know that exciting news was not something to look forward to. What Youngjae found exciting usually became what made Mark's work life hard and uncomfortable.

Youngjae was well meaning but not grounded. While trying so hard to do his best he gets swept up by every new trend and new idea. Extremely susceptible to every new pop psychology pseudoscience management technique on offer. Most recently he had moved everybody's desks so that they were sitting in a horseshoe shape to increase productivity. It did not.

"I read an article about this camp. It's a team building and personal development camp. When I saw it, honestly, I was amazed". He handed the pile of papers to Jackson to pass around to everybody. It was a printout about the Patience Team Building and Personal Development Camp. Mark cringed as he saw the logo of a group of office workers holding hands and smiling, surrounded by trees. " It seems like it would be lots of fun but also, it could be just the thing to transform our teamwork and make us even better".

"Is this mandatory?" An employee asked hesitantly after reading the paper and learning that it would go for an entire week. The others looked at Youngjae expectantly, like the question they were presumably all wondering had just been asked.

"No, I'm not going to force you. It's a great opportunity for this team though and it'd be a shame if you missed it". Mark felt slight guilt over how he and probably almost everybody else wasn't going to go. Youngjae so genuinely beleived in what he was saying and had all of the best intentions. Unfortunately, no amount of good intentions could outweigh his overwhelming desire to not be stuck in the middle of nowhere, with nobody but his colleagues, doing team building activities. " If you don't go, you will still get paid even though the office will be closed, but if you do choose to go, not only will it show me that you are committed to Geode Electricity, but as an incentive you will also get paid for the time you are at the camp. Essentially you'll get paid like you're working overtime. Except you'll just be having fun and relaxing with friends in the wilderness" Youngjae explained.

Mark shook his head then looked to Yugyeom, who's eyes were wide with something Mark couldn't interpret. There was a silence over the group while they processed the information.

Jackson was eagerly reading through all of the information on the printout that they had received. "This is going to be so great" He said enthusiastically. "What a fantastic idea".

Youngjae smiled, happy that somebody had finally said something. " I hope everybody else is similarly excited. There is a form attached to the back page. If you decide you wanna to come, fill that out and have it to me by Monday". He paused and looked back at the clock. "Well, by the time you all log back into your phones it would pretty much be time to go anyway. If you want you can just turn your computers off and you can go".

Everybody walked back to their desks and did as their boss told them. Yugyeom turned to Mark as he finished shutting down his computer. "Are you gonna go?" He asked curiously.

"No" Mark scoffed, almost like it was funny and he thought Yugeom should be embarrassed for even asking. "Of course I'm not". Then he noticed Yugyeom's eyes still on him. He furrowed his brow slightly, confused by his younger friend. ".. Are you?".

"Like.. possibly? I'd definitely consider it. I hate team building stuff just as much as you but I could really use the extra money" He explained as they made their way to the exit. Mark was surprised and felt a little sorry for his friend and what he would have to go through, but he understood.

"You gotta do what you gotta do, I guess". The boys were now out of the building and walking to the carpark as Mark would often drive Yugyeom home from work since his house was on his way. There was a strong contrast between the cool crisp air of the office and the clammy humid weather outside. Spending so much time in air conditioning could almost make you forget that it was the middle of summer, but the walk to the car was a sharp reminder.

"Yeah.." Yugyeom said quietly, not saying much else until they reached the car. Mark's attempt to open the door to the driver's seat was interrupted by Yugyeom swerving himself in front of him and leaning against the door. His head was ever so slightly tilted to the side and he had his cute face on. Mark hoped he wasn't about to ask what he thought he was about to ask. "Mark.. please don't make me go alone" He said almost desperately.

"I'm not making you do anything" Dismissed Mark, avoiding looking at his face, not wanting to be weakened by it. He tried again to open the door that his friend was leaning against and Yugyeom finally took the hint and stepped away. He walked around the back of the car to the passenger's side.

Mark started the car, the air conditioning blared in their faces immediately, almost a ~~~~bit too much. Mark pointed it slightly downwards on his side, so his eyes wouldn't get dry and watery. Then they drove out of the carpark in silence. Mark could tell that Yugyeom kept looking at him, hoping to get his attention, but he used the premise of having to watch the road to ignore it.

"Please?" Yugyeom finally said. Mark sighed.

"I know it sucks that you have to go alone but I really really _really_ don't want to go" Mark explained as sympathetically as he could manage without giving his younger friend a cue to guilt him. His voice showed the tiredness of having been on the phone all day.

"You don't want that extra money?" Yugyeom asked casually, trying to tempt him.

"Seems like an ok price to pay to not have to go on that camp" Mark replied. Yugyeom slumpled in his seat slightly, Mark wasn't budging as easily as he had hoped.

Mark was relieved that Yugyeom seemed to have left the topic alone and was instead playing around on his phone. He was able to drive in peace until the next time they stopped at a red light, when Yugyeom practically shoved his phone in his face.

"Do what you want, but i just want you to know that this is how much money you are depriving yourself of" He told him.

Mark squinted at the number in the calculator app. "That can't be right" He commented, taking his eyes off of the screen and back to the road.

"Yes it is!" Yugyeom whined indignantly. "Have you even looked at the printout they gave us? It tells you how many hours we'll be paid for. With overtime rates that's a lot of money".

Mark lightly pursed his lips, shaking his head. He did not want to be swayed but Yugyeom was right, that really was a lot of money.

"It wouldn't be so bad. We could just stick to each other the entire time, do camping stuff, laugh at people doing embarrassing team building activities-".

" We would also _be_ the people doing the embarrassing team building activities" Mark interrupted him.

"We would get through it. It's not like we haven't had to do them at the office before, basically for free". Yugyeom had a point, no matter how much Mark didn't want him too. They stopped at another red light and Mark fixed his soft silver hair with his fingers, which had become somewhat of a habit when he was stressed. When he glanced to his friend it was probably obvious that his defenses were crumbling.

".. If I did go" Yugyeom's eyes lit up as those words left Mark's lips. "..would you promise to stick around me and not leave like, ever, while we're there? Because I can deal with these guys, but not when they are my only human contact and I'm stranded in the woods".

"Why would I make you come all the way out and then just ditch you? Trust me, we'll get through the camp and it'll be fine" Yugyeom reassured.

Mark sighed then paused, almost like he was putting off what he knew he would have to say. Yugyeom watched him, all wide eyed and excited. It made Mark feel a bit self conscious.

"..Ok, I'll go" Mark surrendered.

"Thank you thank you thank you" Said Yugyeom happily, like Mark had just lifted a weight off his shoulders. Mark nodded unenthusiastically, mostly watching the road, knowing that he would regret his decision.


	2. Chapter 2

This is not what should be happening, but for some reason it was. The bus doors slid shut and it's engine started up, making the whole bus vibrate. Mark watched helplessly out the window as the familiar carpark of Geode Electricity got further and further away. He was trapped in this box and so was everybody else, with the air conditioning struggling at full capacity to keep the passengers from cooking.

"It looks like almost everybody came, even Hakyeon is here" Mark observed, noticing that even the office's lively I.T. man was invited. He supposed Hakyeon was a part of the team though, even though he had a different job. They had computer trouble often enough that he was always rushing around fixing stuff, it would seem weirder for him _not_ to be there.

"Guess the money got to everybody else too" Yugyeom said casually. It was definitely a lot of money to be paying an entire team of close to 30 people, but Youngjae must somehow believe that it's worth it. Mark could never pretend to understand his boss's logic.

 

 

The further they went, the less it looked like the inner city that both of them were used to. Office buildings and apartment blocks were slowly replaced by creeks and trees. Until eventually, there was nothing left that they recognized. They were so far from home that it was completely new territory.

They drove past large open plains of land which were often inhabited by horses, cows or sheep. Mark wondered if the animals saw people drive by very much, as he watched them chew grass and stare while the bus passed. There had been almost nobody else on the road for a while.

"Guys, I'm passing back a questionnaire that they need you to complete for the camp and a box of pencils. When it reaches you, take a questionnaire and a pencil and pass the pile over to the person behind you" Youngjae told the group from the front of the bus.

Mark and Yugyeom perked up. They had been a bit absent since running out of stuff to say to each other a few miles ago and had taken to staring out the window instead. Yugyeom peered over the other seats, looking for when it was coming their way. "I wonder what it is.."

Mark shrugged in response and waited until Yugyeom could get the pile from the pair sitting in front of them.

Yugyeom looked at the questionaire, with Mark reading over his shoulder. "It looks like some kind of personality test or something.." Yugyeom said, then pulled two off the top of the pile and passed the rest of the stack to the people sitting behind them.

Mark studied the piece of paper, it was surprising just how personal the test could get. It asked for all sorts of information. Like questions about how you relate to other people, how you see yourself, how outgoing you are, how introverted you are, how much you like to follow the rules, and more. "I guess the camp people want to get to know us" Mark suggested.

"I guess so" Yugyeom agreed quietly, already filling in the first few questions. Mark looked around and noticed how the the low chatter of the bus had been replaced by the soft scratching of pencils on paper. He decided that he should start too.

 

 

When most of the employees seemed to be finished, Youngjae instructed them to pass their test to the front to be collected by him.

Yugyeom stretched as much as his seating arrangement would allow and pushed his hair out of his eyes. "That was so hard, like, I didn't know how honest I was supposed to be. When it was asking about whether i'm generally prepared or unprepared, or whether I'm impulsive or I plan, just, I kinda don't want to tell my boss that. The personality that I answered in that test is wildly different from the personality on my resume".

Mark agreed with him, though he hadn't had the same difficulty. He had felt uncomfortable having to answer stuff that he considered to be somewhat personal, but he didn't feel like his personality was necessarily incompatible with what a boss would want. Sure, he was never going to stand out or be popular around the office, but he was responsible, and level headed. He was quietly dependable, not the kind of person boss's like to promote, but the kind of person they like to keep around nonetheless.

 

 

" I haven't seen any farm animals for a while" Mark informed his friend since he was the only one looking out the window anymore.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, we're probably getting closer" Yugyeom replied before resuming playing a game on his phone, which was just about all he could use it for since they lost reception a while ago. The general scenery had changed. There were no more paddocks and private property. Now the bus was winding up a road that was so heavily lined with trees that it felt like they were driving through a forest.

The other passengers seemed to be getting more restless and talkative. Almost like they knew that they were close to being freed from the bus and the very idea was making them excited. Not that there was anything to look forward to when they were off the bus, at least not in mark's opinion.

Then he noticed a sign, informing them to turn left to Camp Patience. "Hey, look" He nudged Yugyeom, who was still distracted by his game.

He caught Yugyeom's eyes widening slightly before his face settled into a more of a sarcastic grin. "Well, here we are" Yugyeom said, feining excitement. Mark turned his head and watched the sign dissapear into the distance behind the bus. The logo that he had seen on the printout of the office workers holding hands was dramatically more creepy when it was blown up huge on a sign _and_ when he knew he was going to be one of those office workers. He swallowed hard and forced himself to look away from it.

After driving up a long tree lined path, the bus was now driving through the campsite. The ride itself became more bumpy and uneaven as the ground beneath the tires switched to dry dusty soil. They reached an area where some other cars were parked, this was where the driver carefully began to pull up.

In front of them the passengers could see a large and rustic wooden building with two camp workers standing on the tiny patio that wrapped around the front. When they moved out of the way to wave the bus through, it revealed that the building was adorned by a placard which labelled it Patience Hall.

"They look kinda like they should be in a commercial with a sports drink in their hand" Yugyeom joked as the bus parked next to the camp workers who looked more enthusiastic than the situation required. Mark smirked and agreed.

They were both wearing the same outfit, obviously the camp uniform, which was a white polo shirt with two apple green horizontal stripes around each sleeve and the same obnoxiously bright apple green for the shorts, which ended a few inches above the knee.

The female worker had her light brown hair braided to the side, which was normal enough. What got Yugyeom was how the male employee really added to the commercial look by wearing a thin apple green headband in his hair behind his fringe, seemingly just for decorative purposes and not actually pushing back his hair much at all. Top that off with the white socks with stripes to match the shirt and white running shoes and they were ready to sell a sports drink. Except for the small camp logo embroidered on the shirt, that didn't quite fit the sporty aesthetic.

The bus doors flung open and Youngjae instructed everybody to file out, waiting until everybody had exited the bus before he left himself. As soon as Mark and Yugyeom's feet left the sticky plastic bus flooring and stepped outside, they were again hit by the heavy contrast between the icy conditioned air that they had been used to for the last few hours and the feverish heat of the outdoors.

"Hi everybody! Are you the group from Geode Electricity?" Asked the female camp worker.

"Yes, that's us" Said Youngjae, getting off the bus just in time to reply.

"Fantastic! Welcome to Camp Patience, I'm Moonbyul and this is Jaebum" She gestured to the other camp worker quite excitedly. The group mumbled a reply that  certainly did not match her energy level, except for a few that said hello quite clearly. "Hopefully we'll be able to learn all of your names too". She said to the group with a smile, unphased by their lacking enthusiasm.

Then Jaebum took over, the first thing Mark noticed was what a strong voice he had, it gave him a very confident, almost commanding precense. Jaebum ajusted the headband that rested in his black hair with both hands as he began. "It's great to see a team that is decidicated to becoming the best they can be. Each of you bring something different, whether it's a different rank, experience level, strengths, weaknesses or attitudes. At Camp Patience we beleive you get out what you put in and no matter who you are, if you work hard, I guarantee you will all get a lot out of this experience". Mark looked over and noticed how Youngjae practically had star eyes, hanging on Jaebum's every word. Jaebum seemed like he was being sincere, like he really believed in what he was saying, which Mark could respect to a degree, but being sincere doesn't always equal being right. " You'll be seeing me mostly for the teamwork, leadership and assertiveness related activities" Jaebum explained. Yugyeom nudged Mark, knowing that he would be cringing a little at the idea of assertiveness activities.

"And my specialty is the personal development and self esteem based activities. I'll be taking you guys first, so let's get started, I'll show you around my neck of the woods" Moonbyul said with a cheerful giggle.

"But what about their luggage?" Asked Youngjae, referring to the bags that were stored in the bus.

"Don't you guys worry about that, I'll take care of unloading the luggage, you just go with Moonbyul" Instructed Jaebum. He almost turned to walk away but then he stopped, like he just remembered something he was meant to do. "Hey are you Youngjae, the boss?".

" I am" Youngjae answered proudly.

"Before you go, have you got the tests? I should get them to Solar in admin so she can add up the results".

"Oh, of course" Youngjae slipped his backpack off one shoulder and around to the front, then he unzipped it and pulled out a folder.

"Thank you" Jaebum said as it was handed to him. "Have fun guys".

"We will" Said Youngjae with a smile, he was a seemingly unending stream of optimism.

 

 

The group followed Moonbyul while she showed them around the camp site. She walked them inside of Patience hall, which was apparently where they would eat their meals. It was a hall with polished wooden floors and so much space that they almost didn't seem to know what to do with it. It was blank but cozy, kind of reminding mark of the assembly hall of his old high school, except with tables and chairs.

Then she showed them the back of the hall, where the presently uninhabited kitchen, the staff room and Solar's office were.

Moonbyul lightly knocked on the door. "Hey, it's me, I'm here with the group from Geode Electricity".

"Come in".

A woman with long silky hair stood up from her desk, but remained behind it. "Hey everybody, I'm Solar, I do all the administration stuff for Camp patience. You might not see me around as much as Moonbyul or Jaebum, but feel free to stop and say hi whenever. Was there anything you wanted to ask me?" She looked to Moonbyul.

"No, I'm just showing them around".

"Ok, well it was nice to meet you all but I should probably get back to work" She smiled tiredly.

"That's fine, I just wanted to show them where your office was" She waved goodbye and wished her luck, then coaxed everybody out of the office and shut the door. "Solar probably works the hardest out of anybody here. She's pretty amazing" Moonbyul said quietly as they walked down the corridor and past the kitchen. They were about to exit the corridor when a girl's voice yelled out from somewhere.

"Hey Moon, how's the new group going?".

Moonbyul turned and took a few steps back. Peering into the room that had a placard declaring it to be the Staff Room. Some of the campers tried to peek inside, but then they didn't have to because the girl walked over to the doorway and they were able to see that the voice belonged to a pretty girl who looked close to Yugyeom's age. She had short blonde hair that she wore up in a pony tail and wore the same uniform as Moonbyul and Jaebum. "Hey Hwasa, the new group is great" Moonbyul said, looking back at over the campers. "I'm still showing them around".

"Has she got the new campers with her?" Said somebody from the other side of the room. A boy with orange hair and round cheeks hurried over to stand next to Hwasa. There was a pause as he looked out the door, just as eager as the girl to see all the new faces. Mark noticed him smile at him and Yugyeom when he was looking over their direction. He seemed like a friendly guy.

"Uh" Moonbyul paused briefly too, thrown off by the unexpected interruption, but she gathered herself. "These are two of the camp's chefs, Hwasa and Jimin". Jimin nodded and Hwasa gave everybody a wave. "and if you look inside, there's our other chefs, Minseok and Yixing. Anyway, we should continue". As each group member walked past the room they peered inside to the two men sitting on the couch, they would offer a wave, but weren't quite as enthusiastic as Hwasa or Jimin.

"If any concerns come up for you while you're here, you can go to myself, Jaebum or Solar about it" She explained as she led them out of Patience Hall.

 

 

Next Moonbyul took them to the lake, which was visible in the distance from the hall. She told them that it was where water activities such as rafting and canoeing took place.

"We have to sneak out and go swimming some time while we're here" Yugyeom said very quietly.

Mark looked out over the murky lake, partly wondering how clean it was. The idea of swimming sure was inviting though. "Yeah, if it stays this hot I'd definitely consider it".

Moonbyul let the campers have a bit more of a look at the lake before telling them that there wasn't much else there so they should continue.

They walked in silence until they came up to a set of small buildings.

"What's that?" Asked a camper, Mark couldn't see who it was from where he was standing.

"Those are our cabins, but as Youngjae probably told you, something that sets Camp Patience apart from other Camps that cater to workplaces is that we offer the full outdoor experience. So while some employers will still choose for their team to stay in the cabins, many, like Youngjae, will choose the more classic camping experience of sleeping under the stars in a tent" Moonbyul explained.

As they walked by, leaving the nice, comfortable cabins behind, Mark was reminded of how he will never understand his boss's decision making.

Then she pointed out the area that they would be using to set up their tents. A grassy area, far away enough from the lake and not too dense with trees. It seemed ok, hopefully insects and wildlife wouldn't be too much of an issue.

 

 

After walking a little bit further they approached a forest, dark, green and brimming with pine trees, this was where they stopped. There was a set of two wooden tables with benches just before the forest, just big enough for the entire group to sit down.

Mark tried to appreciate that he was out in nature even though he couldn't appreciate the camp itself. The heat had at least gotten a little more bearable since his body adjusted to it more. It was ok, just kind of obnoxiously sunny. At least the tables they were sitting at had a shade shelter built over it.

He noticed that the air did feel cleaner, with nothing but the faint smell of grass and pine on it. That was something that was nicer than the city.

Mark's appreciation was interrupted by Moonbyul gracelessly dropping the box she had been carrying on the table. "I'm not gonna show you guys through the woods today, because it's just way too much ground to cover. But through when your schedule says you have an activity in the woods, you meet up with the group here at the tables. Then the camp worker will lead you to where you need to be. Don't worry if you forget where stuff is, you'll get a map when we give you your schedules" Moonbyul explained.

"When will we get our schedules?" Asked Sunny, a Geode employee that Mark had seen around but never talked to.

"Soon, Solar should give them to me when she gives me your test results" Moonbyul guessed.

"What were the tests for?" Sunny questioned, trying to pry any information she could about the questions that everybody wanted to know.

"It's a surprise!" Moonbyul answered cheerfully as she began unpacking the box. Mark saw Yugyeom slump at the dissapointing answer. It was kind of funny how happily she had said such obviously dissapoibting news. The group watched her pull out a series of items. A packet of brown paper bags, felt pens, glue, sequins, feathers, scissors, cardboard and blank badges. "Hey, just to help me and Jaebum with learning all of your names, could you guys take a blank badge and write your name on it?" She offered the badge box to the group. "If you could wear your name badge to activities that would be a huge help" She added, while the employees reached for the felt pens and wrote their name.

Moonbyul looked more at ease after everybody was wearing their name tag, like her group had stopped being an anonymous sea of faces. "Ok, so you probably remember me mentioning that my specialty was personal development and self esteem. You might be wondering what self esteem has to do with the any of this and how it's even relevant to the workplace. Does anybody have any guesses?". She looked over the group expectantly. Everybody just kind of looked at each other, seeing if somebody else was going to answer. "Yes.. Jackson?" She said, reading the name tag of the only employee raising their hand.

"If an employee has good self esteem they can show confidence to the customer, which will make the customer believe that the employee has confidence in the company" Jackson answered, then looked to Youngjae who lightly nodded at him.

"That's right. Anybody else? Any more reasons?". She waited patiently but nobody else offered any ideas. "Ok, well. Self esteem is so relevant to the workplace in ways you might not even notice. An employee who is happy with being themself and confident in their ability is more able to take on new challenges, assert them self in a team, more likely to find fulfillment in their work and will find it easier to form meaningful friendships with fellow employees".

Yugyeom raised his hand but started asking his question the moment Moonbyul glanced over. "But how do we improve our self esteem? Will you show us how?" He had a sincere, almost urgent tone but a smirk on his lips. Mark shoved his shoulder into him, completely aware that his friend was just amusing himself. Unfortunately it could be hard for people who didn't know Yugyeom well to tell the difference.

"Oh course i will, I have a whole bunch of stuff planned. But let's start at the beggining". She grabbed a marker from the box and stepped closer to a whiteboard which was in front of the tables, it was like she was going into teacher mode. "The way that people manage in the workplace is interesting because humans are very emotional beings. However at work we are often expected to pretend that we are not, we are expected to operate purely from logic and what we know we a supposed to do. Most of us manage to do this. But various factors can wear us down, especially in the customer service industry". Moonbyul removed the lid and fit it onto the end of her pen. "Who here has had a customer who made them feel angry?".

Just about everybody raised their hand with ease.

"Ok, quite a few of you. How about a customer who made you feel bad about yourself?" She asked, her face softening to a more sympathetic look.

A few people raised their hands, others just looked around to see who else was. After Youngjae bravely raised his hand a few more followed.

Moonbyul nodded in response. "Now this next question is a bit harder but I want you to be honest. Have you ever been made to feel bad about yourself by a fellow employee?".

Sunny's hand shot up immediately but everybody else wasn't quite so eager to share.

"Come on guys, there's gotta be more than that, it's ok, this is a judgment free zone" Moonbyul said, then stood and watched, like she was happy to simply wait until she got more admissions.

Mark looked around to see who was going to raise their hand. His mistake was making eye contact with Youngjae, who was looking at him very directly, like he was expecting something of Mark, encouraging him. He didn't know how Youngjae managed to get to him, but Mark found himself slowly raising his hand. He had to avoid even looking at Yugyeom who was probably shocked that he was participating at all.

"Thank you for your honesty" Said Moonbyul before turning to the whiteboard and drawing two cartoonish blobs. One of them had spikes, sharp teeth and angry eyebrows. The other had fur, rosy cheeks and a smile. "Since we have very little control over how customers will treat us, the next best thing we can do is make sure we are treating each other well" She explained while she drew. "This isn't just about not saying mean things, it's also about learning how to build each other up and showing appreciation and support. Which brings us to.. "She paused while she wrote the words she was about to say on the board. "Warm Fuzzies and Cold Pricklies" She finished her sentence as she underlined the words.

"It's like they think we're five" Yugyeom joked quietly, but not quietly enough.

"Whispering while somebody is giving a presentation.." Moonbyul mumbled as she wrote it under the angry blob. "That's an example of a cold prickly. A cold prickly is an action or interaction that will have a negative effect on somebody's self esteem and therefore their work performance. Does anybody have any other examples of Cold Pricklies?".

Yugyeom's eyes widened when he saw this. "Hey, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel bad" He interrupted.

"That's fine, I've learned how to not be too effected by Cold Pricklies. It was just a helpful example" She explained, showing a smile to prove she was unbothered. Yugyeom nodded hesitantly. "Has anybody come up with any other examples?" She asked.

She took some examples from the group and wrote them down on the board.

 

 

"Our next activity is going to be about Warm Fuzzies" She said excitedly. "A Warm Fuzzy is the opposite of a Cold Prickly, it's actions and interactions that have a positive effect on somebody's self esteem. We want to get you giving and receiving as many as possible so we're going to be making a Warm Fuzzies bag. Here's mine as an example". She held up a brown paper bag with the name Moonbyul written on it with purple glitter glue. The name was surrounded by small drawings of cats, sequins and stick on gems.

"That's so cute!" Commented Victoria, a girl who was sitting next to Sunny.

"Thank you" Moonbyul smiled. "When you make your Warm Fuzzy bags we'll hang them up in Patience Hall. Then, whenever you want to say something nice about somebody, or you notice somebody making progress, write it down on a piece of paper and put it in their Warm Fuzzy bag. Just remember, the idea is for it to be completely anonymous. So if you see somebody putting a note in somebody's bag, don't tell anybody, just pretend you didn't see it".

Hakyeon raised his hand. "But what if people put mean messages in your bag?" He asked.

"We're all adults here, I'd really like to believe that wouldn't happen. On the off chance that it does, come tell me Jaebum or Solar about it, but in the meantime, let's have a little trust in our team and let's make an agreement to only build each other up, not tear each other down. Do you all agree?".

The group said yes and that was enough for her, so Moonbyul began laying out the craft supplies so that everybody could reach them and gave everybody a paper bag.

 

 

"Some stuff like the scissors we don't have enough for everybody so you'll just have to share, but that's kind of teamwork too, isn't it?" Moonbyul said as she slowly walked around the tables, checking that nobody was having any difficulty.

"Everybody is gonna fill mine with insults. This is the chance they've been waiting for" Mark said dejectedly, only loud enough for Yugyeom to hear.

"It'll be ok" Yugyeom leaned into him slightly to comfort him. "People really seem like they've moved on. You're old news, don't worry about it. Hey, could you pass the glitter?". Mark nodded and passed it to him.

After some time had passed, Moonbyul was walking around having a closer look at some of the campers designs since many of the campers seemed to be finished. Mark instinctively shurnk down when he felt her precense behind them.

"That looks really nice Yugyeom, can I see?" Moonbyul asked.

"Yeah, sure" He handed her his paper bag which was still lightly damp from the craft glue.

She looked at the yellow block letters that spelled his name with the dark blue glitter background decorated with star shaped sequins. "Wonderful" She lowered it back down onto the table. "Are you going to be finished soon Mark?".

"I am finished" Mark informed her. He had been finished since two minutes into the activity.

"Oh.. Sorry" She peered over his shoulder at his brown paper bag which simply had Mark written in blue felt pen. "Yours is just a bit more minimalist than Yugyeom's, good job though, I like it" She smiled and kept walking to see how the other campers projects were doing.

Mark rolled his eyes as she left.

 

 

They finished up the Warm Fuzzies bag activity and Moonbyul got everybody to stand up for the next activity. She lead them out to the grassy field that surrounded them.

"I would like you to pick a partner for the next exercise" She informed the group, then she paused and waited for the chatter that followed to die down. Mark and Yugyeom knew without words that they were each others partners, simply exchanging a glance. "When you have a partner I would like you to go and find a spot on the grass to stand with them and pick which of you will be the talker and which will be the listener. The talker must talk for two minutes about what they like about themselves. The listener must not say anything for the entire duration of the talking. However, we would like the listener to practice open and supportive body language".

"Shots being the listener" Yugyeom said hastily, again not paying enough attention to the volume of his voice.

Moonbyul gave him a stern glance for interrupting, which worried him a bit. Then she continued "You will both get a turn a both roles, you just have to decide who will go first. This activity is particularly interesting because even confident people can have a hard time with it. Our society puts so much effort into teaching us to be humble and to not be arrogant, sometimes at the expense of our self esteem. Some of us learn to downplay our achievements and talents, to not seem like we're bragging. Some of us think that knowing that we are beautiful is vanity. Some of us just never notice what makes themselves special. Whoever you are, this activity can really show you a lot about how you see yourself. Anyway let's get started, pair up and go find a spot to sit".

The group paired off and followed Moonbyul's orders.

Mark and Yugyeom looked for a spot as far away from the rest of the group as would be allowed without looking suspicious or standing out. The sun dried grass crunched under their shoes as they walked, reminding them of how relentless the heat was.

Moonbyul checked that everybody had found a spot then pressed a few buttons on her stop watch and shouted " Ok, go!".

Mark and Yugyeom stood facing each other blankly until Mark broke the silence.

"This is the worst team building activity ever" Mark commented, moving his hair out of his eyes.

"Pretty much" He agreed, looking over his shoulder to check that Moonbyul was nowhere near them.

"Like, how do they even come up with such a bad idea?".

"I dunno but you better start telling me what you like about yourself before we run out of time" Said Yugyeom.

Mark furrowed his eyebrows at his friend. "I'm not doing that" He said blankly.

"I know, it's cool, I was just joking".

Mark smiled a little. "Do you reckon they won't notice we're not doing the activity as long as they can see our lips moving?".

"We're probably fine as long as we do the activity when Moonbyul is close" Yugyeom replied, noticing how Moonbyul was walking by each pair, watching how they are doing. "See? This is why I needed you here, what if I'd had to pair up with some guy who actually wanted to do this stuff?".

Mark held his hands in front of him "Don't even. I can barely even handle pretending to do this stuff" He said, overwhelmed at the very suggestion.

"I wonder if most of them are just faking it too" Yugyeom speculated, looking over at the other pairs.

"I doubt it" Mark replied, it seemed unlikely from the sheer awkwardness and discomfort he could see exuding from their body language.

They chattered away a bit longer, then Moonbyul yelled for everybody to switch roles. Which Mark and Yugyeom basically ignored.

"I wonder how big our tent is going to be, it would have been nice if they'd let us get our stuff set up when we got here, let us relax and get used to the place a bit" Yugyeom said.

"Our accommodation can wait, our self esteem is more important, Yugyeom" Mark joked.

 "Aaaa she's coming over" Yugyeom said quietly. Mark immediately turned his focus to him. Playing the role of the listener.

"I really like how I work hard and don't forget about my goals. I also like how I'm such a devoted friend and-" Yugyeom turned his head and smiled at Moonbyul as she walked by. "I take care of people around me when I can and sometimes i'm-".

" She's gone" Mark informed him.

"Ah, good" Yugyeom sighed.

"I also like how you work hard and don't forget about your goals".

"Shut up" Yugyeom said. Mark laughed quietly.

Mark watched Yugyeom's eyes fixate on something behind him and saw the corners of his mouth turn upwards. Mark looked back over his shoulder but he couldn't tell what he was looking at. "What? What are you looking at?" Mark finally asked.

"Have you seen Jackson?" He said, with a slight giggle.

Mark looked back again, then looked at Yugyeom confusedly. "Yeah? What about him?". Jackson didn't look like he was doing anything out of the ordinary. Yeah he was paired up with Youngjae, but that was to be expected.

"Just look at his cap" Yugyeom said, gesturing for Mark to look again. Yugyeom watched Mark's facial expression change from confused to disbeleif when he saw it and turned his head back toward him.

"Why did he bring that with him".

"I know right? I wonder if he wears it when he goes out on weekends too?" Yugyeom laughed at the idea of it.

Mark just shook his head, Jackson was just too much sometimes. It was like this job was his favorite thing in his life. Mark would almost understand if he was just desperately trying to kiss ass and get a promotion, but his enthusiasm was far too genuine for that. Mark had forgotten about the bag they everybody got given when they were new to the company and had just finished training. It contained a lanyard, a swipe card to get into the building, some crappy company merchandize like a pen, notebook and a cap with Geode Electricity written across it in big tacky letters. He had thrown his in the back of his closet and forgotten about it, he assumed everybody else did the same. Not Jackson, apparently.

They noticed Solar hurrying over in the distance and Moonbyul walking over to meet her. Solar handed her a folder and talked to her a little while catching her breath.

"I wonder if that could be our schedules" Mark speculated. Yugyeom nodded, still watching them.

Solar left shortly after and eventually Moonbyul signalled that the time was up and gathered everybody over.

 

 

She handed out two pieces of paper to everybody. There was a paper about the test results and the other was the camp schedule.

The test results explained that the test they had taken was the Myers Briggs personality type test and told them a bit about what their result meant.

"..ISFJ" Mark read. "Which did you get?".

" ENFP" Yugeom replied, busily reading about his results.

"What's this?" Mark muttered, reading something at the bottom of the page that simply said Match with an ESFP with no further explanation.

"What's what?" Asked Yugyeom. Mark ran his fingertip along the section he was referring to, but on Yugyeom's own page.

"You've probably noticed the match part at the bottom of your test. For our next activity I would like you to find a person of the personality type you are matched with and have them be your partner". Mark and Yugyeom just looked at each other uncomfortably, Moonbyul waited but nobody else seemed to move much either. " Get talking with each other! You're not gonna find out who's your type match without asking them!" Moonbyul told them and tried to coax them to mingle.

People began to slowly and awkwardly walk around the group asking who had which type. Some of the employees weren't as unenthusiastic, but they were probably the employees with E at the start of their personality type. Mark was sure that team building activities were just designed to punish introverted people. He asked a few people here and there, but no luck. He felt extremely uncomfortable with the whole situation.

Then he noticed Jackson asking somebody else something that made him nervous.

"Are you an ISFJ?" Jackson asked a few people as Mark froze and watched, but he knew what he had to do. Mark decided to bite the bullet and walk over to him.

"Are you an ESFP?" Mark asked, kind of hoping he would say no.

Jackson shot his head around, immediately turning his attention to Mark. "Yes, are you an ISFJ?" He asked with a grin. Mark nodded. "Looks like we're partners then" Jackson said.

"I guess so" Said Mark. He followed Jackson to stand a little bit away from the others so that people would know they were a pair and wouldn't waste their time asking which type they were.

"So.. Do you like the camp so far?" Jackson asked, probably to end the silence while they wait for other people to pair up.

Mark opened his mouth, about to answer honestly, but for all he knew what he said could be repeated to Youngjae. So instead he simply said "It's ok.. Do you like it?".

"I love being out in nature with my friends and the idea of the camp. I wasn't that into making the Warm Fuzzies bag though, that was kind of.. I don't know but I guess they know what their doing, they're the experts on team building, not us" Jackson answered.

It must be nice to be able to see this ordeal as just being in nature with friends, Mark thought to himself. "I wasn't a big fan of that activity either" He replied. Or the activity after it, or whatever activity they're about to do, or any other activity they will do for the duration of the camp, but he would never say that.

"Everybody's paired up? Ok, so, the last activity was good to get you warmed up, but let's get you out of your comfort zone a bit now. Let's do the last activity again, but with your partner. Notice how different it is when you are not with a partner of your choice. I want you to take note of any discomfort or difficulties you have so that we can share as a group afterwards. Ok? Awesome! Go find a spot and I'll tell you when to start".

Mark quite instantly felt an overwhelming urge to run away and find some excuse to go home. He shot Yugyeom a worried glance but he was being lead off by his own partner.

" You wanna go over there?" Asked Jackson, pointing to a spot a little away from the others.

"..Sure" Mark responded, since there was no other option.

"Would you rather be talker or listener first?" Jackson asked as they walked over.

"Listener, definitely" Mark decided.

"I thought you would choose that. Lots of people seemed pretty intimidated by being the talker".

" Well it is pretty intimidating" Mark said.

"You'll be fine, besides you already practiced with Yugyeom right? Just pretend I'm Yugyeom" Jackson said confidently, attempting to set him at ease.

Mark gave him a small obligatory smile and nodded.

 

 

"Ok, Go!" Commanded Moonbyul.

"What do I like about me.. I like that I am good at my job, I like that I have good friends, I like that I don't run away from new challenges". The ease with which he could list off things he liked about himself made Mark even more nervous for when it would be his turn. It made it hard to concentrate because half of the time that Jackson was talking, Mark was just thinking about what he was going to say when it was his turn. Eventually he realized that he had been doing this, just vacantly staring at Jackson's lips moving for ages instead of paying attention. He made himself snap out of it. "I have a strong lower body, I like the way my hair looks sometimes, um, what else, I like the way I make ramen noodles uh.. I like-".

"Times up, swap roles!" Yelled Moonbyul.

Seeing the way that even Jackson was running out of ideas towards the end made the task seem twice as hard. Mark looked at Jackson and smiled, more out of nervousness than anything else.

"You'll do great, just tell me what you told Yugyeom" Jackson said before going quiet, like the activity required.

Mark wished that it could be like with Yugyeom, but there was no way he would get away with not actually doing the activity with Jackson. He attempted to swallow all of the discomfort he felt and just wing it and hope for the best. Jackson would be far more likely to tolerate him trying and failing than not trying at all.

"What I like about me is.. I like.. that I am good to my friends.. I like that I am good at dancing..". He paused while he tried to come up with more. It was almost distracting how seriously Jackson was taking the advice that the listener should have open and supportive body language. Somehow he reminded Mark of a parent proudly watching their child's dance recital, his eyes unwavering from Mark and a soft smile on his lips. It threw him off his train of thought a bit. "Uh.. People have told me I can be pretty reliable, sometimes.." Jackson nodded in response, awaiting more. Mark was trying to go over everything he could say but he was drawing blanks, and anything he did come up with just seemed too braggy or embarasing or weird.

Jackson, noticing his discomfort, tried to offer a suggestion. "How about you-".

" Are you the listener, Jackson?" Moonbyul interrupted as she walked by.

"Yes I am but-".

" She put her finger to her lips. "No talking".

His expression turned to a pout briefly but then he turned back to Mark and got back into his role.

Mark just wanted this to end, he could not believe he was probably not even a minute in yet. He wished that Jackson would just be like a normal person and do a half assed job at this horrible activity, barely making eye contact, not paying him much attention, waiting for it to be over. Rather than making mark feel like he was so watched that he couldn't even blink without Jackson noticing.

" I.. Uh.." He stared off at the other pairs, hoping he would come up with something, anything to fill the remaining time with, but he didn't. Bringing his gaze back to Jackson just brought more urgency. ~~~~"I.. I just can't" He conceded, admitting defeat. Jackson furrowed his brow then openened his mouth to talk, but stopped himself because he was unsure if he was allowed to talk yet. An awkward silence passed between them for the remainder of the activity.

"Times up!" Yelled Moonbyul. "Everybody come gather over here".

Mark immediately started walking over, like he couldn't leave the situation he was in fast enough. Jackson followed, though not quite as hurriedly.Mark looked until he spotted Yugyeom, who was obviously looking for him too, he perked up when he made eye contact with Mark.

Mark grabbed onto his younger friend's arm. " Don't ever leave me again" He said with relief in his voice.

"Hey! I had no choice!" Yugyeom protested. "That was so messed up. I never want to do that ever again" He added, obviously he had a bad time with the activity too.

"Could I get you all to sit down in a circle?" Moonbyul asked, gesturing for the group to spread out. "Ok, fantastic. Now I wanted us to have the chance to share a bit. Because I'm sure that was quite a confronting experience for some of us. I'd like to start by going around the circle and finding out how being the listener was for you. So let's start with Victoria, could you tell us something you noticed your partner struggle with, A compliment for your partner or some encouraging words, and anything about playing the listener role that you want to share with the group?".

" Sure.. Well I noticed that Hani had a bit of trouble getting started" Victoria looked over to Hani, like she was talking to her more than the group. "But when she got going she was fine, she just needed to get going to see that it wasn't so bad. So some encouraging words.. I encourage you to keep pushing yourself and trying new things.. I haven't really got anything to share about playing the listener role. Is that ok?" She looked over to Moonbyul when she asked the question.

"That's totally fine, Taekwoon, how about you?".

"Me?".

"Yeah".

" Uhm.. I'm trying to think of something but Yugyeom didn't really seem to struggle with anything, he was very good" Taekwoon said quietly. Mark looked at Yugyeom with wide eyes, but he just shrugged.

"Don't feel like you have to say something if there wasn't anything" Moonbyul said.

"Ok.. and a compliment.. You are very confident and made this activity look easy and as listener I get the chance to learn things about people I wouldn't otherwise get to know". He looked at Moonbyul, showing that he was finished.

 

 

She asked more people around the circle. Mark felt uneasy about what would happen when they got to Jackson. Even though others had trouble with the activity, nobody else seemed to just stop half way through. It didn't help knowing that his boss took this stuff so seriously.

"And Mark?" Said Moonbyul. Suddenly everybody's eyes were on him, especially Jackson.

"Uh.. Jackson didn't really have much trouble..".

"Hey, I know I said i was ok with it but I can't keep getting this answer from everybody" Moonbyul advised the group. "It's actually more helpful to the person if you tell them what you noticed honestly".

".. Well he kind of was choosing more small insignificant things that he liked about himself toward the end" Mark added. "But he never had any pauses and managed to talk the entire time, so that was pretty impressive". Mark noticed Jackson's smile come back. " and um, yeah, you did a good job" He finished.

More and more people shared their experiences and it became more obvious that only Mark hadn't managed to complete the task. He did feel a bit less alone learning about how it was hard for almost everybody though. Bambam, who had the misfortune of being paired up with his boss told the group that even Youngjae himself had difficulty.

"Jackson?" Said Moonbyul, keeping the sharing going.

"Sure, well as you know I was paired with Mark". Mark's heart jumped a bit as he felt all the eyes go from Jackson to him. " He had difficulty knowing what to say but he tried very hard despite this" He looked over to Mark. "It was good to see you push yourself like that". Oddly those kind words made him feel really happy, especially when he was expecting to be humiliated. "And like Taekwoon said, listening is good because you get to learn things you didn't know before"

 

 

Moonbyul waited until everybody in the group had a turn. The sun began to set while people were talking, making their surroundings look much softer.

Mark noticed her looking at her watch more and more toward the end. When the last person finished she stood up. "Thank you so much for sharing what you have with us today and thank you all for being so honest. I wanted to ask you about what being the talker was like too but it seems like we won't have time because dinner is almost ready. So, if you could, I'd like you to discuss what that role was like amongst yourselves over dinner. No pressure, just a few words. Anyway, I should get you guys to Patience Hall, it's getting dark".

The group stood up and began walking. Mark took in his surroundings as he walked, noticing how everywhere looked different in the evening, the lake looked more peaceful, the air smelled sweeter, the heat settled into a gentle comforting warmth.

 "Hey Yugyeom, wanna tell me about why you were so amazing at that activity with Taekwoon?" Mark asked.

Yugyeom looked at him for a moment before smirking and simply telling him "I'll have a discussion about it over dinner".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That chapter ended up being really big. There was just way too much stuff that I wanted to fit. Anyway I hope it didn't just seem like a bunch of filler. Because introducing the camp seemed kind of necessary.


	3. Chapter 3

Upon entering Patience Hall the campers were told to go line up to receive their dinner. There was a large cutout in the wall of the kitchen with a long bench on either side of it. The campers could pick up a tray and the chefs would serve them what was on offer. This time it was pizza, to celebrate their first day at the camp.

Minseok and Jimin were serving, most of the Campers gave them a polite Thank You as they received their pizza slices.

After Mark and Yugyeom filled their plates, they sat down at an empty table.

"I'm so hungry" Said Yugyeom, picking up a slice of his pizza.

"Same". Mark took a bite of his own then asked "So what happened with the activity?".

Yugyeom pointed at his mouth, signalling to his friend that he would have to wait for him to finish chewing. "There isn't really much to tell".

"How? Apparently you were like, perfect" Mark disagreed.

"I just did what I did when Moonbyul walked over to us, but with Taekwoon. Just saying any cliche reasons somebody would like themselves that I could come up with. No big deal really" He explained.

"Were they even true?" Mark asked. He wasn't feeling judgmental, more so just curious.

The younger boy laughed and made a wobbly hand gesture. "Kind of. Well, most of them could possibly apply to me. Towards the end I kind of ran out of ideas and might have exaggerated my talents in a few areas".

"I kind of wish I'd done that" Said Mark, looking down at his plate. Knowing full well that he wouldn't actually do that.

"Oh yeah, what was it like being paired with Jackson? Tell me everything" He leaned in slightly, looking at Mark with great interest.

"It was ok" Mark said, then picked up his second slice of pizza. He noticed that Yugyeom was still eagerly awaiting more information, his face made it obvious. "The activity was really bad and I actually had to do it because he's way more uncynical about this camp than we are, but.."

Yugyeom nodded, like he was urging him to continue. Presumably he was expecting something way more interesting that what actually occurred.

"But considering how I pretty much froze half way through the activity, he was way nicer at sharing time than I was expecting him to be".

"Yeah.." Yugyeom rested his cheek ok his hand which was supported by his elbow on the table. "..He's not really so bad, he's pretty nice to most people actually".

Mark nodded, he knew that Yugyeom had been working for Geode since he was very young. Because of this, he had known most of the employees for longer than Mark had. "Yeah like, if he wasn't such an extension of Youngjae we would probably be friends".

Yugyeom looked over to Jackson who was at the boss's table with a few other employees. His mouth formed a half smirk. "Well that's not gonna happen".

 Mark looked over but didn't say anything.

 

 

"Did everybody enjoy the meal?" Solar addressed the hall, smiling at the response. "I'm glad. I'm here to tell you a bit about how Camp Patience uses the Myers Briggs test. You would have seen today how we not only give you a personality analysis, but also, a match to a partner". The entire hall seemed to go silent.

Mark looked to Yugyeom worriedly, as he registered the idea that the matches might not have just been for that specific activity.

"The person you were matched up with will be your camp buddy for the duration of the camp. We wanted to see how you would work together without the pressure of knowing they would continue to be your partner and we were very impressed. Moonbyul told me that you all seemed to cooperate wonderfully".

Youngjae was probably the only person who didn't look shocked and uneasy from this. Mark wondered if he had cooperated poorly if he would have gotten to pick a different partner.

She continued. "We use a special matching algarythm which was developed by the founder of Camp Patience. It's goal is to match you to somebody who will be compatible enough that you will get along, but different enough that they might not be somebody you would normally be friends with. From their differences you will learn about other peoples working styles, how to work together with a varied team and hopefully, the experience will teach you a few things about yourself too".

Sunny raised her hand, with a discontent look on her face. "Why weren't we told about this on the camp information printout we were given?".

"I understand that this will be a bit shocking and a difficult adjustment for some of you, but it's all a part of the experience. It's about teaching you to be adaptive and adjust to any situation that gets thrown at you. If we warned you about it, it just wouldn't have the same effect". The chatter of the campers got much louder at this point and she gave it a moment to settle. "Being your camp buddy means you will be working with them for all partner activities".

Mark felt his stomach sink and his mouth go dry. That familiar feeling of wanting to run away and go home returned. Yugyeom was looking at him with sympathy, as if to say I'm Sorry with a facial expression.

Solar was just fanning the flames at this point by adding "It also means that they will be the person you share your tent with. It might seem a little strange, but i'm sure you will warm up to your partner and it will feel natural in no time. To give you some more time to get to know each other, we're going to have a tent building activity after dinner that will be directed by Jaebum".

Mark knew that him being in this situation wasn't Yugyeom's fault, he could have never anticipated what a bad camp Youngjae would have chosen either. As much as he knew he wouldn't even be at the camp if it weren't for him, he couldn't bring himself to be angry. He would just have to cope and get through this week. After all, it was only a week.

 

 

The campers brought their empty plates over to the kitchen to be washed up, then followed Jaebum out the door of the hall. Just before they exited, he asked if a person from each pair could help him carry a gas lamp and a camping bag. The objects that they needed were neatly lined up against the wall, as were their luggage bags if they chose to take them, since they had the choice to keep them at Patience Hall if they were too big and bulky for the tent.

 

 

"I like to build the tents at night time because it can be very physical work and it's much harder when the sun is up. Unfortunately, you need to be able to see what you're doing to build a tent. That's why I like to bring this many lamps" Jaebum explained as they walked.

Yugyeom was among the people who volunteered to carry a lamp. They were almost blinding to look at directly for too long, but they gave the surrounding area a soft glow. The dusty ground that they stepped over looked different now that Mark could noticed every single tiny pebble and rock because of the way the lamp made everything's shadow stretch out.

"At least I don't have to deal with your snorning" Yugyeom finally said, having been quite silent since the announcement.

"I don't snore" Mark protested, which made Yugyeom smile.

"How would you know?".

Mark paused, he actually did have a point there.

Mark vaguely noticed the light of another lamp coming up from behind him, then suddenly, he turned to the side and Jackson was standing next to him

"Hey".

"Hey" Mark said, probably more shyly than he intended.

Jackson leaned around Mark slightly. "Hey Yugyeom, how's it going?".

"Yeah.. Pretty ok I guess" Yugyeom replied, unsure of what more to tell him.

Then Jackson's attention turned back to Mark. "So, we're partners".

"Yeah, I guess we are".

"Are you ok with that?" Jackson asked.

He looked kind of concerned to Mark, though, both of their facial expressions were partly obscured by the odd way that the shadows on their faces fell when they were carrying the lamps. It kind of reminded him of when he was a kid and his friends would hold a torch under their face for effect while telling spooky stories.

"..Yeah, it's ok. Why do you ask?".

"Oh just.. You don't seem very enthusiastic" His tone was like he was joking around but probably also just saying what he actually meant.

"..Sorry. I guess it's just pretty unexpected. I was all prepared to spend this camp with Yugyeom, you know? I'm just.. Adjusting". He looked at his feet after he finished his sentence. It's true that he wasn't enthusiastic, but that wasn't Jacksons fault. Truthfully, he would be dreading being teamed up with anybody who wasn't Yugyeom.

" Yeah I was expecting to be working with Youngjae most of the time I was here, but we were supposed to expect the unexpected right?".

"I guess we were" Mark agreed. He was right, it did say that on the camp information print out, though he hadn't taken it very seriously.

 

 

When they reached the area where they were to build the tents, Jaebum got Youngjae to volunteer to help build a tent with him, to demonstrate to the group how it's done. They didn't make it look too complicated, Mark was sure he and Jackson could manage it.

"How about over there?" Jackson suggested, after Jaebum had told the campers they could pick a spot and get started.

"Where?" Mark asked before he had actually turned to look where he was pointing. "Oh, sure".

They walked over, their way illuminated by the gas lamp that Jackson was carrying. Mark glanced  back over at Yugyeom with Taekwoon, then set the heavy shoulder bag down with a thud. He squatted down to unzip the camping bag and rummage around for the necessary parts. He had to lift out the sleeping bags and sheets to hand to Jackson so that he could see. Then out of the bag came the tent rods, the cover, the stakes to hold it to the ground and a block to hammer them in with.

Mark reached up to get the bedding off Jackson so it could be put in the bag, then after he zipped it closed he stood up. "They said we're supposed to put these together first, right?" He asked, bending over to pick up the bundle of tent rods.

"Yeah, we have to build the frame" Jackson said. He took some of the rods from Marks hands and began trying to fit them together, Mark watched him briefly before realizing that he should be doing the same and started fitting rods together too. "Then when you're finished we have to fit the cover over them, kind of crossing them over" Jackson added, crossing his long line of tent rods over Mark's to demonstrate.

"Ok, I'm almost done" Mark was hurriedly finishing up the other half of the tent frame. He was relieved that Jackson had paid so much attention to the demonstration, it made building the tent a much easier process.

"Have you got it?" Asked Jackson, watching Mark struggle to get the last piece to fit.

"Yeah.." Mark said unsurely, still trying.

"Can I try?".

Mark looked up from what he was doing. "If you want to".

Jackson's fingers grazed against his as he took the rods from him. Mark watched the shadows playing on his face as he focused, trying to make the tent frame cooperate.

"Why won't it..". He watched Jackson's face contort in ways that he didn't see at the office. Then Jackson sighed with relief "There done". He smiled at Mark and handed it back to him. " Must have just been a bit faulty. It's in now though".

"Thanks" Mark said as he picked up the tent cover and looked for where the rods were meant to go.

 

 

"We built a pretty good tent, in my opinion" Jackson commented as they stood back, observing the finished product of their labor.

"Yeah, we did good" Mark agreed. "We finished way before everybody else did" He added, after noticing only a few other finished tents.

"Yeah, let's have a look inside" Jackson said eagerly then unzipped the front of the tent and crawled in. "Come on" He coaxed, looking back over his shoulder, when he noticed that Mark hadn't budged.

Mark found an unexpected smile creeping onto his face due to finding Jackson's child like enthusiasm slightly endearing. He followed him into the tent, getting down to his hands and knees to get through the entrance.

 

 

The campers sat on logs surrounding an empty fire pit. It wasn't much to look at, the mess of soot, ash and burnt sticks, but it was preferable to actually having a camp fire. It had only properly cooled down a few hours ago and people seemed to be appreciating the change.

The logs weren't far from the tents, they could see each pairs completed work from where they were. Jaebum was congratulating them on their teamwork and how quickly they had accomplished the task.

"You'll probably be happy to know that's all for today. You all worked hard and you've earned a rest. Just remember, bright and early start tomorrow so don't stay up too late" Jaebum told the group.

"We won't" some of the campers replied happily.

Jaebum gave slightly tired thumbs up then stood up. "If you guys get in any trouble, you can come get me. Just knock on the door to the cabins, ok?".

Then Jaebum left and the group was left unsupervised for the first time at the camp. Though, it didn't quite feel like being unsupervised when your boss is a part of that group.

There was a silence after that, like people still didn't quite get that they were free to do what they wanted.

" So.." Youngjae finally said, looking around keenly. "What do you guys think of the camp?".

He got some " yeah.."s and some "It's fun.."s with the obligatory level of fake enthusiasm. With a few honest opinions, like how Bambam loves being out in nature but finds the activities kind of embarrassing, or how Jackson is just so happy to be there.

Eventually, people stopped feeling like they had to hang at as a group and drifted into their usual cliques. Mark and Yugyeom took this as an opportunity to go on a small walk around the campsite.

 

 

" Are you even going to cope without your phone?".

"Hey, I can go without it you know.. I just prefer not to if it can be avoided.. Which it should be, considering that there is no good reason they shouldn't let us charge our phones".

Mark just chuckled at his response.

" Only five percent, my poor baby" Yugyeom said forlornly, checking his phone battery.

"Your poor baby will manage.. You however.."

"How's it gonna be sharing a tent with Jackson?" Yugyeom asked abruptly to cut him off.

"Um.. Pretty much like sharing a tent with anybody else here that I barely know, I guess" Mark answered, possibly with a vaguely more defensive tone than he intended.

Mark could tell that Yugyeom was inspecting his face with a mischevious look in his eyes. This made Mark almost by reflex will his face to be even blanker than it already was.

"Is it gonna be weird for you?" Yugyeom asked with seemingly genuine concern.

"No.. It wouldn't be weird for me. Well, not more weird than sharing a tent with anybody else here".

"Ok, ok.." Yugyeom looked to the ground as they walked till a small but prominent smile formed on his lips, the kind of smile that a person has when they know something and they kind of want you to know that they know something. The kind of smile that wasn't going anywhere until it was acknowledged.

Mark suddenly felt more tired than he did before. "What?".

"It's just, since you used to have a crush on him and all, I just figured that it might be weird".

"That was so long ago, let it go!" Mark said indignantly. He honestly was kind of waiting for him to bring that fact up. He knew it was coming, yet somehow it still felt jarring. "It was like the breifest crush anyway, I was new, he was hot, I barely knew him. It happens. But it was totally way less significant than you like to make it out to be" Mark explained, his tone getting meeker as he went.

"So Jackson's hot, now?".

Mark sighed in frustration, knowing that he was just trying to stir him up. Yugyeom laughed at his own antics. "Hey Yugyeom, remind me to never tell you stuff like this again".

"Hey! That's not fair, I've been a good secret keeper, it's not like I ever bring it up when people are around" Yugyeom protested, ending his laughter abruptly.

"That's true" Mark nodded. "Now you just need to work on not bringing it up around me either".

Yugyeom chuckled, making his friend smile a bit too. Though, Mark hoped that he understood that he was at least slightly serious.

 

 

Eventually it felt late enough that they decided they should sleep. They said goodnight to each other and went to their separate tents. Mark could see that Jackson hadn't moved from where the group had been sitting with Jaebum, he seemed to be busy with Youngjae, Hakyeon and Hani. This didn't bother Mark though, since it would probably be easier to get to sleep with the tent to himself. It seemed likely to him that he would be woken up as soon as Jackson entered the tent, considering what a light sleeper he was, but measuring that against how completely worn out and tired he was, he felt like he at least had a chance to sleep through the night.


	4. Chapter 4

It was a slight shock when Mark opened his eyes. Seeing the sun glaring through the tent fabric instead of the dust gathering on his bedroom ceiling. Not to mention the man sleeping next to him.

Mark looked at him briefly, he had never seen what Jackson looked like when he slept before. It was definitely unusual to have his face so close to somebody he didn't even know that well. He imagined Jackson's eyes flickering open while he was looking at him and quickly rolled onto his back, choosing to look at stitching of the tent celeing instead.

There seemed to be some chatter outside, Mark very carefully sat up and began to unzip the door, as quietly as he could possibly manage.

"Do you know what time it is?" Jackson asked in a slightly hoarser tone than usual. Mark jumped slightly and looked back. He was lying on his side, with his eyes still closed, like wasn't awake enough yet to open them.

"Uh, I can check with somebody if you want?" Mark quickly unzipped the rest of the door.

"Nah, don't bother, I should get up anyway" He said blearily while rubbing his eyes. Then he sighed, like what he was about to do was really difficult, then he sat upright in a swift motion. He blinked his eyes as he tried to adjust to the sunlight outside the door. "Hey, is that Jaebum?".

Mark recognized the voice too and peered outside. "Yeah, he's talking to a group of people outside, we should hurry over".

They stood next to each other at the back of the crowd, until Mark spotted Yugyeom, then he quickly left to stand next to his friend. He looked back and felt briefly unsure of whether that was rude or if it was completely what was expected and Jackson was just waiting to go be with Youngjae or Hakyeon or any of his many friends too.

"Is everybody here now?" Jaebum asked the group. "Ok, I'm going to be having an activity with you guys at the tables that you made Warm Fuzzy bags with Moonbyul at, but I'll let you have some breakfast before we get started. So if you're still wearing your pajamas, get dressed and come to Patience Hall".

 

 

"So," Jaebum clapped loudly to get the groups attention as he turned around. They had reached their destination. "Today's activity is all about trust. Now, I know we all basically know what trust is, but can somebody give me a definition?.. Yes, Youngjae?".

"To believe in somebody's ability, to put faith in their competence".

" Close, but not exactly. Though, I see how that stuff specifically is very relevant if you're a boss. That's more on the side of having confidence in somebody rather than trust. Anybody else?". He looked over the confused faces of the campers and decided to spare them. "Trust involves a trustor and a trustee. The trustor is making an evaluation of the trustee's future actions and if they choose to trust, they are firmly believing in the fairness, honesty and benevolence of the trustee. They are giving a large degree of control over to the trustee and giving them the option to effect the trustor future positively or negatively. Interestingly, people tend to have a much easier time forgiving a failure of competence or ability than a failure or fairness or benevolence. Why would that be?".

Hani hesitantly raised her hand. "Because a failure or trust can be more hurtful and damaging?".

"You're right, it can definitely be more hurtful. However a failure of competence can be very damaging, it could have giant consequences to a business if the failure is bad enough. The type of damage that is very different though and emotional damage creates deeper wounds. Trust is both logical and emotional. We are trying to make a logical prediction when we choose to trust somebody, but our emotional history with that person and others will be a main factor in the decision. Now, I'm going to ask you a question and I want you to be honest with me. Do you trust your team? Raise hands".

The majority were raising their hands, and looking to see if that was what everybody else was doing. Mark almost went to raise his hand, just so he wouldn't stand out, but then Jaebum added "Don't feel obligated just because others are raising their hands, it's ok to not trust too, I don't know your story, I don't know your reasons, but you're here to learn and that's what matters".

Mark lowered his hand, so did Sunny and Taekwoon. Mark noticed Hakyeon's hand hesitate, but he left it where it was.

"Ok, we're gonna work on building and testing some trust today". Jaebum smiled and pushed off of the table he was leaning against. "A work environment where the employees trust each other functions better and creates better teamwork, but it's not just about trusting. The trustees must also be putting in effort toward being trustworthy people. We're going to practice both. So go find a space with your camp buddy".

Mark pretty much saw what was coming from the fact that Jaebum had such a big speech about trust. He actually dreaded this activity a lot less than the self esteem activities he had done with Moonbyul. Trust falls were easy, also they were something that he had been made to do before by Youngjae, except back then he had Yugyeom as a partner. So the fact that it was familiar made it seem far less daunting.

"Do you want me to be the trustor first?" Jackson offered.

"Either way, it doesn't bother me".

Jackson nodded and moved to stand behind Mark. " Whenever you're ready".

Mark glanced over his shoulder and saw that Jackson was barely standing any distance from him at all. He folded his arms over his chest, closed his eyes and let himself fall back. He was almost immediately caught by Jackson's hands on his sides at the top of his ribs. It was a slightly ticklish place to be grabbed and Mark felt his hair stand on end from it. He squirmed slightly, standing upright with a smile. "You can probably go a bit further away than that if you want" Mark suggested.

"I was just starting off close in case it was hard for you" He explained, stepping back a little.

"Thanks, it's ok though, I'm pretty fine with this kind of activity" Mark said just before letting himself fall into Jackson's arms again. This time Jackson managed to catch him with just his hands on his back. He held him for a moment then helped Mark stand upright. "You want to try?" Mark asked after another fall.

They swapped places and Mark decided to follow Jackson's lead, starting quite close behind him, but planning to move further away with each catch.

Jackson folded his hands over his chest and paused, Mark wondered what he was waiting for.

He looked back over his shoulder. "You're definitely going to catch me right?" He said quite seriously.

"Yes" Mark answered with a slight laugh.

"I was just checking" Jackson said, like he was trying to hush him. He was smiling though.

Jackson let his weight go to his heels and fell backwards like a straight plank of wood. Mark caught him quite easily, which was lucky because he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he had dropped him in that moment. "Do you want me to go further back?" He asked while helping him upright.

Jackson did well for the rest of the activity. It was like all he had needed was the confirmation from Mark that he definitely wasn't going to let him fall.

"You both have been doing really well, I've been watching" Jaebum commented as he walked over after checking up with another pair. Mark figured that Jaebum must have been watching because of how he had indicated that he didn't trust his team. "Evidently you seem to trust each other".

" Yeah, I guess" Mark smiled awkwardly, unsure of what to tell him. Jaebum nodded satisfiedly and walked away.

"What's this _I guess_ about? Jackson teased after Jaebum had walked far away enough.

"Oh, just.. It's not anything about you, I just don't feel like trust has much to do with how afraid I will be of falling" He tried to explain.

"You don't?".

Mark opened his mouth to clarify but was interrupted.

"Has everybody had a turn being the trustee and the trustor?.. Ok, can I get everybody to come gather around the table? Jaebum instructed. He walked the group over to the tables. "Now that i've seen that you all have the ability to place your trust in your partner, I'd like to see you place your trust in a group. Your team, specifically".

Mark wondered if this was going to be a pattern of how activities were structured. Warm up with a slightly less horrible activity and get lulled into a false sense of security, then remove everything that made the activity easy.

 

 

Jaebum explained to the campers that they would be doing elevated trust falls from the table and showed them how to make a net with their arms to catch the camper with. Nobody seemed particularly thrilled, but Jaebum assured them that this could be a very meaningful and powerful activity. That was of little comfort to Mark, but he was hoping he would just be able to get it out of the way quickly, throw himself off the table and have it over with.

The campers had to form two lines, facing each other, they built a ladder with their arms which would act as the net, a track for the person to land on.

Jaebum suggested that Youngjae go first because he is the teams leader.

"Go Youngjae!" Bambam encouraged as Youngjae stepped onto the table. A few others copied him with encouragements, which made Youngjae smile embarrassedly.

Mark and Hani were monkey gripping each others arms as was instructed. He was torn between being afraid that if he didn't grip tight enough Youngjae could drop through and not wanting to grip so tight he hurt her, but as Youngjae turned around she tightened her grip substantially, which he hoped would make up for it.

Youngjae falling into the net of arms was a bit of a shock but they caught him with ease, which was reassuring. Youngjae couldn't stop laughing until he calmed down, which Jaebum explained is a normal way the body can react to shock or adrenaline.

Next was Bambam, who fell with no issue, many of the people who followed made it look easy too. Mark wondered if they were just acting, or if it really was as easy as they made it look.

"You can do it Yugyeom" Mark said, when he noticed how much his friend seemed to be hesitating. He was standing on the table with his back to the group, seeming unable to will himself to go.

"Yeah, you can do it" Added Taekwoon, a little more quiet.

Yugyeom fell with a blood curdling scream. Then, similar to Youngjae, he had an uncontrollable fit of laughter. Mark's heart had jumped from the scream, his eyes hadn't stopped being wide with shock, even after Yugyeom had calmed down. Somehow his friends reaction seemed like a more honest account of what it would be like.

There were a few more screamers, such as Sunny and Hakyeon, then eventually it was Mark's turn.

He lifted himself onto the table, trying to hold onto the belief that it would be just like when he did trust falls on the ground.

"You can do it, Mark" Encouraged Jackson from the ground, the safe, comfortable ground.

Yugyeom whistled and added "Go Mark" enthusiastically.

Mark got himself into position, folding his arms over his chest with his back to the group. He just had to do it, he just had to get it over with. He slowly shifted more of his weight onto his heels.

Then, just as he felt himself tip, it was like his body decided no and he quickly rocked foward and caught himself. Even just tipping back like that had made his heart race.

"Are you ok there?" Asked Jaebum.

Mark had a quick glance over his shoulder. "Yeah, fine" He said shakily. They couldn't possibly expect him to just fall backwards at this height, with his body completely straight, not even trying to brace himself at all. It couldn't be legal, or at least it certainly shouldn't be. He found himself distracted by wondering how many people had been seriously injured from stuff like this. Apparently his way of procrastinating doing the terrifying thing was to make himself more terrified of it.

"What you're feeling right now is perfectly natural. Your body is probably flowing with adrenaline, which is actually preparing you for this moment. Your team wants to show you that you can count on them. How about you let them show you, Mark? It will be over before you know it" Jaebum said in his best soothing voice.

It was lucky that Mark was turned around so that Jaebum couldn't see the face he was making.

"You have to trust us, it's easy after you decide to trust" Jackson said, trying to coax him.

"How would you know? You haven't even had to do this yet" Mark said, more aggressively than he had intended due to the stress.

"No, but I've done it on the ground with you".

"It's totally different". Part of Mark knew he was making a spectacle of himself, but it was also easy enough to pretend that only Jackson was there, not his entire workplace. With his back turned it wasn't like he could see any of them.

"How? It's the exact same idea. You trust and then you fall".

Mark paused. " I don't want to do this" He said quietly.

"Mark isn't being a team player" Jackson said to Jaebum with seemingly genuine concern. Mark's eyes narrowed and he wanted to cringe so badly. He was pretty sure he heard Yugyeom laugh then stop himself.

"That's not very encouraging. He probably has reasons that he doesn't want to do this. It just means he possibly has some bigger hurdles to get over. As his camp buddy you need to be encouraging, not critical".

Jackson nodded, taking on the advice. " Sorry Mark".

"..That's ok" Mark had to smile at the ridiculousness of the situation.

"We'll be here for you if you feel ready to jump, but you don't have to if you're not ready" Jackson reassured.

"Yeah, nobody will judge you if you don't do it" Youngjae added.

Mark took a deep breath, his nerves calming with the obligation gone. Then he climbed down from the table, avoiding eye contact with the rest of the group as much as he was able.

"Ok, Taeyeon, your turn" Said Jaebum, taking the attention away from Mark.


	5. Chapter 5

After they finished up with Jaebum's activity, he had a debrief where he encouraged the campers to share what the experience had been like for them, good or bad. Mark declined to share and was relieved to find that Jaebum didn't push him to.

Then after lunch they had an activities scheduled with Moonbyul. They started with an activity which was presumably as deeply uncomfortable for everybody involved as it was for Mark. Each camper was instructed to find exactly seven different campers to hug and exchange a compliment with. Part of the problem being that Mark did not have seven people that he felt comfortable with, or who he knew well enough that he would even have anything to compliment them about.

Him and Yugyeom was the easy part.

"I like your pants" Mark said in a tone that wasn't obviously mocking, but was enough that somebody who knew him like Yugyeom did could tell. He released his friend from the hug and glanced at the obnoxiously colored swimming shorts that his friend had resorted to wearing due to the increasingly hot weather.

"Thanks" Yugyeom replied with an eye roll. "You are such a good friend".

Mark stood, waiting for the compliment before realizing that was it. Yugyeom laughed and walked off. Mark saw Jackson releasing from a hug with Amber, then saw him glance over and make eye contact. Jackson quickly gave a compliment to her then walked over and wrapped his arms around Mark with very little warning.

Mark's heartbeat sped up a little, probably because of how he was taken by surprise. He cautiously put his arms on Jacksons back. Jackson gave good hugs, it was nothing like the discomfort he was anticipating from hugging the other campers. Instead it was warm and actually kind of comforting and nice.

"I like how you're a bit mysterious".

" What?". Then Mark remembered that he was in fact doing an activity, not just hugging Jackson.

"What?" Jackson responded with his eyebrows slightly raised after letting go of their hug. "I'm complimenting you".

" I know, but how am I mysterious?" Mark smirked, finding his choice kind of funny.

"I don't know, you just are, I don't actually know that much about you and you are more quiet and closed off than most of the other people here and I don't know, it's kind of interesting to have the chance to get to know you".

His answer kind of made Mark smile, but also feel a bit awkward and unsure of how to respond.

"Have you got a compliment for me?" Jackson prompted, interrupting Mark from having to reply at all.

Mark looked over the man in front of him while he tried to choose something. If he's being honest with himself, the first thing that came to him was how attractive he is, not that he would ever say that. He hardly gave much weight to thoughts like that when they came up though, after all, he had eyes so how could he not notice. But it didn't have to mean anything. Just because he stopped having a crush on Jackson doesn't mean he magically stopped being attractive.

He tried to go through things he had noticed about Jackson, such as the way he could make friends so easily and everybody in the office seemed to love him, or how devoted he was to the company. But somehow, they didn't seem like the things to choose, they were just the main things he had noticed while watching him from a distance at the office, and to a degree they were things that had made him feel slightly resentful in the past. Which felt completely misdirected and wrong the more time he actually spent around him.

He noticed Jackson's expectant gaze and realized how much he was stalling. "Um.. I like how much you try to make people feel comfortable and feel good about themselves".

The corners of Jackson's mouth turned upwards at this, so clearly Mark had at least picked something ok. " Thank you Mark" He said quite genuinely. "Good luck".

Then Jackson walked away to find somebody else and Mark was left with the task of getting in the personal space of people he barely liked and barely knew.

 

 

" I feel like it's" Yugyeom stopped mid sentence to thank Jimin for the black soybean noodles he just ladelled onto his plate. "I feel like it's getting easier, don't you?".

"What's getting easier?".

" All the weird touchy feely self esteem stuff with Moonbyul" He answered as they got out of the line and walked over to an empty table with their meals.

"I guess" Said Mark unconvincingly.

Yugyeom lightly slapped at Mark's wrist. "You should try being more positive".

Mark looked at him with a furrowed brow, "They've gotten to you haven't they".

"No they haven't _gotten to me,_ it's just easier to kind of go with it than it is to be really opposed to everything".

" So.. What you're saying is they've gotten to you and you want to recruit me too" Mark said with a straight face but laughed when Yugyeom slapped his wrist even harder.

"Geez, it's not like it's a cult or something. I don't believe in any of this stuff either. I'm just telling you how to get through it easier".

Mark nodded, "It's ok, I believe you".

" How'd you go with the complimenting activity?" Yugyeom asked while chewing his food.

"I really don't like having to get in peoples personal space, you know? Like, I don't want to hug them, and _I know_ they don't want to hug me" He explained.

"I don't know, they're probably just kind of indifferent about it".

Mark continued without acknowledging his comment. " And I just ended up complimenting people on either the same thing they complimented me on or their hair or something. It was so pointless".

He didn't feel an urge to mention how the activity wasn't uncomfortable with Jackson, mostly because it was a small detail and he knew his friend would read too much into it. Especially if he were to tell him how it wasn't only bearable, it was actually sort of nice.

They continued chatting and Yugyeom suggested that they should go check if they have any notes in their Warm Fuzzies bags, which were attached to a cardboard display at the end of the hall. Mark doubted he would have anything in his, not this soon at least, but they decided to check after they were finished, since they were free to do anything they wanted after dinner.

Yugyeom found nothing in his. But to Mark's surprise he pulled out two pieces of paper from his own.

He unfolded a note that was written on lined notebook paper, it said "Mark is cool" in very familiar handwriting.

"Hey, you can have your note back" Mark said as he shoved the note into his friends hand, which made Yugyeom laugh. "When did you even do that?"

"At lunch, I was just really bored when you went to the showers".

" Is this other note from you too?".

"No? There's another note?" Yugyeom asked, looking over Marks shoulder interestedly.

Mark assumed him being surprised was an act until he noticed that this note had distinctly different handwriting.

"What does it say?" Asked Yugyeom impatiently.

"Mark is good at giving compliments" He read, which made him look around to the people at the tables.

"Who wrote that?".

" I don't know" Replied Mark, turning back to his friend. Though, that wasn't entirely true, he had a pretty good idea of who it was.

It was such an incredibly corny but nice thing to do that it kind of involuntarily lifted the corners of his mouth and made him feel odd.

 

 

"Are you going to sleep, Mark?".

Mark turned and noticed where the voice was coming from. "Yeah, kinda".

"I'll be in soon" Jackson told him from his spot by the fire pit. Mark nodded and went to the tent to change into a singlet and a pair of pajama shorts quickly before Jackson was finished with his friends.

Almost as soon as he was done he heard dry grass rustling from the footsteps outside the tent. "Knock knock?" Jackson said playfully.

"Yeah, come in" Mark replied, unzipping the door most of the way for him.

Jackson clumsily made his way into the tent and slid himself over to his spot beside Mark. "Were the mosquitos getting all over you too?" He asked while untying his shoes and placing them in the corner.

"No actually, I guess the insect repellant I brought is working" Mark said as he laid down and shuffled to get comfortable.

"I brought some too! But it does nothing! I tried sitting by the fire you know, because the smoke would be too much for them, but they just kept biting. My blood must be some kind of mosquito delicacy or something".

Mark exhaled a small laugh through his nose. "You can try my insect repellant tomorrow and see your blood really is a _delicacy_ ".

"Hey, thanks" Jackson said just before he took his shirt off to switch it for something more comfortable. Mark averted his gaze kind of automatically, though he did get a glimpse. Then Jackson laid down next to him on his back.

Mark had rolled on his side, facing away from Jackson and was about to close his eyes but he was interrupted by Jackson asking "Hey, are you tired?".

"Kind of, but I'm not really used to sleeping in a tent so I don't know how well I'll be able to sleep".

"Yeah, I've never been camping before. I couldn't sleep for ages last night".

"Not even when you were a kid?".

"Nope" Jackson said with emphasis. "My family wasn't really into that kind of thing" he explained.

Mark rolled over to his back again, feeling impolite for facing away while he was obviously trying to make conversation. "Would kind of make this whole thing seem more exciting" he replied.

"It is exciting" Jackson said, without a shred of dishonesty. Mark smiled a little but only with his mouth, not with his eyes. It was nice that he could see the camp that way, though Mark certainly couldn't. "but I get how it might not be for everybody" Jackson glanced at Mark laying beside him.

Mark glanced too, but returned his gaze to the blue tent ceiling rather quickly, pondering how to respond.

"You don't like being here, do you?".

The sudden directness of the question made Mark feel cornered. He examined Jackson's face, he didn't have an air of judgment about him, quite the opposite. Mostly he just read genuine curiosity from him. Mark carefully considered his response, not wanting to say something that he would regret telling him.

"..Not really, to be honest." He said delicately. "but don't tell Youngjae, it would upset him".

Jackson lowered his eyebrows. "Why would I tell Youngjae?".

Mark blinked, slightly regretting having said that. Telling Youngjae really had seemed like something that he could possibly do, but somehow the more he was actually around Jackson, the less he just seemed like mini Youngjae. Mark felt kind of embarrassed at himself.

"If you were saying really rude or awful stuff about Youngjae, I might tell him, not because he's my boss but because he's my friend, but you don't have to be worrying about me telling on you or something. You're allowed to not like the camp, you don't have to pretend around me. In fact, I'd rather you didn't".

" I um.. Ok, sure" Mark replied, for lack of knowing what else to say. He suddenly felt less sleepy than he did before.

There was a brief silence, but it wasn't long until Jackson filled it.

"Are there _any_ activities you're looking forward to?" He asked.

"Not really. I was kind of looking forward to the idea of swimming in the lake but after I saw our schedule it turns out the lake is only for canoeing and rafting. What about you?".

 He counted on his fingers as he listed. "Archery, Rafting, Orienteering, Partner races because, not to brag but I'm pretty fast..".

So everything, basically" Mark said with a laugh.

"Well, to be honest, I'm not really looking forward to some of Moonbyul's activities" He explained so delicately that it was almost like Moonbyul was in the tent and he was worried about offending her.

"Neither, we'll make it through though" Mark agreed.

"Yeah.. Hey, I'll be right back" Said Jackson, sitting up.

Mark gazed up at him. "Where are you going?"

"Need to pee" answered Jackson, already crawling toward the door.

Mark rolled over and close his eyes, even though it was useless because he would barge back in just a few minutes. But there wasn't much else for him to do since Jackson had taken their only lamp with him, leaving Mark in pitch blackness.

It had been nice of Jackson to clarify that he didn't have to censor himself around him. Though, Mark hoped that he hadn't offended him with his assumption. The more he got to be around Jackson, the more he noticed that he was actually quite sensitive and effected by others, but he showed it very particular Jackson sort of way.

 

 

His eyes shot open when he heard a cry. It kind of sounded like Jackson, though it was hard to tell.

Rather than yell out his name and wake everybody, Mark quickly unzipped the tent and stepped outside. Some of the tents where people hadn't turned their lamps off acted like dull lanterns, lighting the otherwise black night.

"Is everything ok?" Asked Amber, poking out of her tent. "Who was that scream?".

"It could have been Jackson, I'm gonna go check if he's ok" Answered Mark hurriedly.

"Do you want me to come with you?".

" No, that's ok. Thanks though".

"Aren't you at least taking a lamp?".

"Jackson has ours".

"Take this" Amber offered, handing her gas lamp to Mark.

Mark began the short walk to the toilets, in hopes of finding Jackson. It was nice that Amber had helped him out like that, he had barely even spoken to her before. Though, she had pretty much saved him, there was so much unevenness to the ground, random dips, rocks, tree roots that petruded out. Plenty of stuff for him to fall over and injure himself with.

He noticed a man with a gas lamp walking towards him in the distance. He tried to focus his eyes, it looked like Jackson, but he was walking slowly and strangely. Mark hurried over.

When he was close enough to see details, the first thing he noticed was that his knees and the side of his leg were skidded with dirt and there was a spot that looked like it was bleeding.

"Jackson are you ok? What happened?" Mark exclaimed. 

"I just wasn't looking where I was going and stepped on a tree root weirdly, my ankle kind of gave in and I fell over". 

Mark went to stand close to him, nonverbally making him stop walking."Does it feel like you broke it?" He asked, looking concernedly at Jackson's ankle. 

"No, I didn't break it. Forget about it, it's not a big deal, I bet I'll sleep it off and I'll be perfect by morning" Jackson dismissed and began slowly walking again, trying to cover a rather obvious limp. 

Mark didn't protest, just followed him at the very slow pace he set. Mark struggled to watch how Jackson tried to conceal the pain each time he put his weight on that foot, weighing up if he should say the obvious.

"Why are you staring at me?" Said Jackson, voice strained from the pain. 

"Just.. We should probably show Moonbyul or Jaebum your injury" Mark said delicately.

 "I'm ok. Really." Jackson reassured confidently, but Mark didn't believe him.

"Amber heard you scream too, she knows I went to get you. If I come back with you limping like this she's just going to tell you the same thing I am".

He watched Jackson sigh frustratedly as he admitted defeat.

"Let me help you walk" Said Mark as he picked up Jackson's arm and put it over his shoulders. He knew he would be too stubborn to let him unless he just went ahead and did it, and he couldn't watch him be in pain any more. "I'll walk you back to the tent, then I'll go get Jaebum or Moonbyul".

Jackson didn't seem to put up a fight any more. He just said " Ok" and kept walking, letting Mark take some of his weight.

They hobbled back to the tent and Mark told him to wait there. Amber came out of her tent to keep Jackson company while he waited. Then Mark hurried off to the cabins to get help.

Eventually Mark returned with a tired, disheveled Jaebum and a small aid kit. Jaebum asked some questions about the injury while examing Jackson's ankle. While Jackson would try to downplay the whole thing, Mark would add details like how he had difficulty walking, which would make Jackson shoot him a "Could you not" kind of glance, but it was for his own good.

"So, it's nothing serious. It seems like you just rolled your ankle" Jaebum concluded. Jackson looked relieved at this. "But" He added, "You will have to keep off it for a few days so it can heal up".

" But if I do that I'll miss all the stuff we're doing" Jackson protested.

Jaebum looked at him sympathetically, "Unfortunately, that's just what has to happen. You don't want to make your injury worse" He explained.

"If you let it heal up you'll be able to get back to normal camp stuff really soon" Mark comforted. He could tell just how dissapointed Jackson was, which was probably why he was in such denial of his injury.

It must be sad to get so excited about finally getting to go camping and then knowing you're going to miss out on it. Not that Mark could relate, he himself would love an excuse to not participate. But he knew that Jackson was very different.

"I guess so" Jackson replied. "And sorry for making you get up and everything".

" Hey, don't be sorry, it's my job. Was there anything else you need?" Jaebum asked.

"No, I should be ok".

Jaebum gave him a cold pack to help the swelling go down then got up and returned to his cabin.

Mark wished that there was something that he could say to make it better, but he had nothing.

Then Jackson tried to lighten the mood. "Well, at least it's not all bad".

Mark looked at him, just waiting for him to finish.

" At least this means you'll probably get to miss out on some partner activities. Unless they make you do it with Moonbyul or Jaebum or something".

"I couldn't be happy about you hurting yourself" Mark replied seriously. "And also, doing partner stuff with them would be considerably worse than doing stuff with you.  So you better get well soon".

This made Jackson laugh, which gave Mark a small smile.

Eventually Jackson got too sleepy to hold the cold pack to his leg anymore and laid down. Mark took this as his cue that he could close his tired eyes. He had stayed up way past when he had planned to, just talking to him. It hardly seemed right to just go to sleep while the boy next to him tended to his injury alone.

Then they both trailed off to sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

The morning was peaceful and Mark was fast asleep despite the rustling happening around him. "Mark.. Hey Mark". Mark felt something grabbing at his shoulder but was too drowsy to register what was happening. " Mark, Jaebum wants to talk to you".

"W-what?" Mark said tiredly, rubbing his eyes as he woke up.

"Jaebum's here" Jackson answered.

Mark realized that this was true when he his eyes met Jaebum's, who was knealed down by the unzipped tent door. His body jumped from the unexpectedness of it.

"Sorry I had to get you up so early, I just needed to have the chance to talk to you before you go to activities today" Jaebum explained.

"Uh, yeah, sure. Sorry for being so sleepy" Mark said croakily as he sat up and tried to fix his hair into a more normal shape.

"That's fine" Jaebum dismissed. "I just wanted to talk to you about what you were going to do with partner activities since your partner will have to sit out for the more physical activities" He said as he moved to a more comfortable position.

"Wouldn't I just not do those activities? Since I won't have a partner and stuff".

"Not necessarily" Jaebum said with a smile, from which Mark could gather that this was supposed to make him happy. "You could still do the activities with me or Moonbyul so wouldn't miss out".

Mark paused, trying to figure out if there was a way out of this, however it didn't seem very promising.

"But we meant to be partners" Interrupted Jackson. "It's not fair to expect him to be able to do these things with just anybody. The trust and support we have built on this camp isn't just interchangeable with any partner".

While Mark wasn't sure that he actually believed anything that Jackson was saying, he was so glad he was saying it.

"I can see that, but I don't want Mark to be missing out-".

"I wouldn't be missing out" Mark contributed.

Jaebum raised an eyebrow. "You wouldn't?".

"I mean". Mark looked to Jackson who was watching him interestedly. " I would rather help support my camp buddy until he recovers, then we can go back to activities as a team". Mark didn't even know what he was saying, but he was hoping it would end with him not having to do activities with the camp staff..

"To be honest, if I have to be left out of activities, it would be nice to have somebody with me" Jackson agreed. "But, if he wanted to do an activity, I wouldn't stop him".

Jaebum nodded, obviously contemplating what they were saying. " It's up to you Mark. You get out of this camp what you want to get out of it, and if assisting your camp buddy while they're injured is what you would rather do, then that's ok. But, let me know if there are any activities that you want to try and I will help you out".

"Ok, thank you". Mark tried not to let himself smile until Jaebum left.

"You owe me for that". Jackson got Mark's attention with a nudge. Then it registered to Mark that it was both of them who had been acting and not just himself.

"Thank you, really I mean it".

" No problem, it means I don't have to be bored while sitting stuff out either, we both win".

Mark nodded then stared off for a moment, distracted by his own thoughts until Jackson interrupted him.

"Did you not sleep much last night?".

"No i did.. but I woke up a bit during the night" he said unsurely.

"You need some coffee" Jackson commented, not knowing that he was the cause of Mark's disturbed sleep.

 

 

They walked to Patience Hall together for breakfast. Jaebum had given Jackson crutches just before he woke Mark up. Jackson felt like it looked a bit over the top since he hadn't even hurt his ankle very badly. But Jaebum had explained to him that it would mean he could walk around while still giving it a chance to heal. And Jackson would do anything to try to make his recovery faster.

They parted quickly after arriving at the hall, since Jackson wanted to shower before breakfast but Mark was opting to shower after he ate and caught up with Yugyeom.

He found that his friend had arrived well before him since he was already at a table with his breakfast, which was odd considering that Mark was already early, most of the others hadn't even arrived yet. Then something else got his attention, Yugyeom tapping at his phone screen.

"Hey did you charge your phone?" Mark exclaimed as he swerved into the empty chair.

Yugyeom's face formed a cheeky grin. "Shh" He hushed, tapping to pause his game.

"No really, do you have a secret cabin or something?".

" No" He said slyly. "I have my ways".

This response was not enough for Mark, as was evident from the face he was giving him.

" Ok fine. When I went was walking to the bathroom in the night I ran into the cute chef and-".

"Which is the cute chef?". It was a fair question, since the camp did have quite abnormally pretty staff. It made him wonder if it was a part of their hiring policy.

"Jimin, duh. Anyway, we got to talking and he agreed to charge my phone for me in his cabin and slip it back to me at breakfast".

" He has a cabin?".

"Yeah, apparently the staff that doesn't live nearby tend to just live at the camp part time".

Mark nodded. " Hey, I'm gonna go get my breakfast, be right back".

Mark stood up and walked over to the place where they collect their meals. He picked up a tray and a bowl and got in line, not that there was much of a line yet.

After Mark returned to the table he got distracted from his conversation when he noticed Jackson out of the corner of his eye, hobbling by on his crutches with wet hair. Yugyeom's eyes followed Mark's line of vision.

" What happened to him?" He exclaimed.

Mark explained the situation, though his eyes would keep getting distracted, flicking over to his camp partner, eventually he had to do something about it. "I'm uh, just gonna go check if he's ok" Mark said as he stood up from his chair.

"Alright" Replied Yugyeom, returning his focus to his phone game.

Mark felt awkward watching him try to hook a crutch under his arm, holding the tray with that hand instead, then realizing that it would be too precarious to balance his bowl and glass on without both hands. Then he put the tray down and was about to lean the crutches against the wall to leave them behind while he got some food.

"Hey Jackson".

" Oh, Mark, hey" Jackson said, looking over his shoulder at the boy walking over to his side.

"Do you want some help? I can carry your food for you if you want".

Jackson paused, looking at the tray, then at his crutches. " Actually, that would really help. Thank you".

"No problem". Mark smiled softly and picked up the tray, then walked over to the line.

 

 

After everybody was finished Moonbyul took the group to the same place that they had their last activity with her.

" Is everybody here?" Asked Moonbyul at the group gathered around her. She silently counted how many people there were, just to check. "Ok awesome, let's have a seat" She said as he sat herself down comfortably on the grass and waited for the campers to follow her example. "How is everybody doing?".

A few campers replied with "Good" or a similar sentiment.

"That's fantastic, I love that positivity. And Jackson, are you feeling ok? Jaebum told me about what happened".

Mark looked over to him, not that he was far away. Mark still sat next to Yugyeom by default until activities required him to do otherwise, just like many other campers seemed to do with their own cliques. But he had at least chosen to find a spot near Jackson, since he felt at least partly responsible for his wellbeing.

"Yeah, I'm fine, I'll be fixed up really soon".

"I'm glad, and you'll be happy to know that you'll be able to do this activity. No walking or physical activity required".

" Awesome" Jackson said with a thumbs up gesture. Mark couldn't tell if he was being genuine or not, since he had expressed not being a huge fan of Moonbyul's activities when they were in the tent, but perhaps he was just trying his best to be positive.

"This is a very powerful activity that I have planned, I hope you are all energized and ready for it".

The sheer pep and enthusiasm of her voice somehow made Mark feel even more uneasy about the activity that would follow.

" This is the swoosh" she said with emphasis. "The swoosh is about where you are vs where you want to be. Who you are vs who you want to be. It is about how we have the power to change what we don't like about our lives, the only thing stopping you is you".

Mark knew he was making a face, but it was subtle enough that he didn't care.

"Ok, I want you to make sure you are comfortable, if you would prefer to lie down then go for it. Then when you're ready, close your eyes and wait".

Yugyeom laid out and stretched comfortably beside Mark, which prompted Mark to join him. He didn't close his eyes though, instead he looked around, waiting until everybody else had closed theirs before he did.

" Is everybody comfortable? I'd like you all to just relax and let yourself focus on my voice" Moonbyul said soothingly. She gave a pause, letting people slow their breathing. "I would like you to visualize what makes you unhappy about where you are now in your life. Are you never able to do the things you want to do? Do you have difficulties with your relationships? Do you struggle to deal with stress?" She paused and let the group ponder the questions. "Whatever your difficulties are, I would like you to visualize them into a picture".

Mark wondered where this activity was going, and unintentionally placed much more focus on that question than on the visualizing that he was meant to be doing. He was also pretty sure that there were ants crawling on him.

" You could visualize yourself with the person who causes you trouble, or yourself surrounded by your responsibilities. It doesn't matter if it's silly, just create an image and focus on it".

Mark went over his troubles internally. Realistically, his life was ok, well, in his opinion. He had good friends. Sure, he didn't have that many friends, but he kind of preferred it that way. He lived in an ok apartment and his relationship with his parents had improved a lot since he moved out.

He did feel kind of lonely sometimes, if he's honest with himself. that was something that made his life feel a bit lacking. Though, he had become good at managing that feeling. He figured that there were worse things to be than a little lonely.

But other than that, the other main source of unhappiness in his life would have to be Geode Electricity.

"Do you have your picture? Now, I want you to change it. Where do you want your life to be? How could you change these things to make them good? What changes would need to happen for you to be happier?".

 Mark didn't even know what his unhappiness would look like if it was a picture. It would probably be himself, with flashes of work and a side of emptiness. He sort of made himself smirk with how over dramatic that seemed, but the smirk quickly faded.

" You can change anything you want. What would it take to make it better?" Said Moonbyul.

To make it better.. The job market would have to be significantly better, so he could stop being rejected whenever he applies for a new job. Which is hardly something that Mark could see himself having control over.

And the other problem, well..

His mind wandered to something else, forgetting about the activity entirely. The same thing he was distracted by in the tent. He remembered how he had woken up in the middle of the night to Jackson's arms around him, pulling his body closer. Jackson was asleep, of course. It was not the kind of weather for sleeping bags, which meant there was no barrier between their bodies.

He was shocked at first, but then he just felt..comfortable.

It wasn't like he could stop him without waking him up, so instead he just let himself enjoy the feeling of being held and drifted back to sleep. Which he felt kind of weird and almost guilty about. Not that it was his fault that it happened, but he wasn't supposed to like it. Not since Jackson wasn't even aware of his actions.

It had made Mark realized how starved of affection he was. He hadn't done anything non platonic with anybody since Jinyoung. Which is probably why something so simple felt much nicer than it should.

"Realize that the second picture is possible, you are only limited by yourself. If you set the intention, you can create the life you want".

Mark remembered where he was. He wanted to roll his eyes at Moonbyul's comment.

"Visualize the original image of your unhappiness, but don't forget the new image you created. Now, when I count to three I want you to say 'Swoosh' and replace the old image with the newer, happier image. Have you got your old image? Ok, let's say goodbye to it. Are you ready to let it go and live the life you want? Three.. Two.. One.. Swoosh!".

Mark kind of mumbled swoosh, he could hear the other campers saying it also. He didn't even have the time to create an image for where his life should be before the swoosh, but it didn't really matter to him.

 

 

After more of what Mark had deemed to be something like hippy nonsense, they finished with Moonbyul and were sent to lunch.

Then afterwards, they were going to the woods to do low ropes, an obstacle course of sorts.

The sun was out full force when lunch was over and the campers left the cool hall. By the time they arrived at the woods, everybody was sweating at least a little bit.

The woods had a really distinct smell of pine, bark and dirt, which became more noticeable the further in they walked in.

"This is the high ropes course, low ropes is just a bit further" Jaebum told the group as the passed an obstacle course that was practically in the tree tops.

"That looks kind of fun" Yugyeom commented. He was in a good mood since he actually kind of liked the idea of the more physical activities like ropes courses. So he was actually looking forward to this.

Mark nodded. "It would be ok". He also had a preference for activities that were just about physical challenges, though he wouldn't quite say it would be fun but he wouldn't hate it. Too bad Jackson's injury couldn't get him out of the emotional and social challenges instead.

He would glance behind him occasionally, checking that Jackson was ok with his crutches on the uneven leaf coated floor. Though he was happily talking with Hakyeon and Youngjae, not seeming to have any problems.

 

"Here we are" Jaebum announced as the they reached a clearing which was filled with low ropes equipment. It kind of looked like a giant playground. "We can get started soon but I just want to run over some stuff before we do." Jaebum added, hoping to get the attention of campers who were busy looking around. "Jackson and Mark" Jaebum remembered. "You both don't have to stick around while I explain this, you can go find somewhere to sit, just make sure I can see you".

Jackson thanked him and Mark walked over to his side. "Where do you wanna go?" Mark asked.

Jackson already started carrying himself away from the group before he answered, "How about over there?". He couldn't gesture with his hands since they were otherwise occupied, but Mark could tell he meant the area with the tree stumps that was away from the group but still viewable.

Mark could hear Jaebum giving his speech to the group as they walked, about how much this activity depended on team work and reassuring and encouraging your camp buddy. Then he was going over the details of how to be a spotter and that was around when Mark stopped listening.

"Sorry you have to miss out" Mark said as they sat down, noticing Jackson's eyes lingering on the group.

Jackson's gaze immediately switched to Mark. "Hey, it's not like it's your fault. besides, i'm sure we can have fun anyway right?".

Mark found himself nodding and answering "Yeah", even though realistically, he didn't consider himself very fun. "But to be honest I don't know how we're going to pass this much time".

"Yeah but could you imagine if I didn't have you here? I would just be staring at trees or watching them have fun".

" You couldn't bring a book, or something?". 

"I didn't pack anything like that. I didn't really see myself needing it" He answered. " Hey, how did you go with the swoosh activity earlier?".

"Uh.. It was ok. Not really my thing".

" It's not really my thing either, but I try to give it a chance. Moonbyul seems to really believe in what she's doing. Youngjae too, he says he's noticed positive changes in our team already".

"I'm sure she believes in it, and has the best intentions, just..".

" Just?" Jackson asked interestedly.

"Well people can believe in lots of things that aren't necessarily true. It doesn't mean they are bad people who are purposely lying, it just means they're a bit.. lost".

" You think Moonbyul's lost?".

"Uh" Mark hesitated a bit. He didn't want to say anything that could offend him, but Jackson had told him that he preferred him being honest. "Well not her specifically but sort of".

"What do you mean?".

" You know.. It really doesn't matter, forget it" Mark said, picking at the bark of the tree stump.

"No, tell me" Jackson said encouragingly with a smile. "I'm interested".

" It really doesn't matter".

"Fine, I guess we can just sit here and count trees then" Jackson said before looking away pouting.

"Hey we can talk about other things you know" Mark said with a slight laugh, touching Jackson's upper arm.

"But why can't you tell me _this_ thing? It's not like I'm going to be personally offended or something".

"Ok ok" Mark relented. "It's just, none of this stuff is based on facts. Like, the swoosh. She is telling you that all of your problems are solvable and that just by visualizing something different you can change your life.

" Problems do generally have solutions though, if you try really hard".

"That's true for a lot of problems but not all. Like, some things are just beyond peoples control. And after you've already accepted that you are just doing the best you can with bad circumstances, it can feel kind of insulting to be told by them that I can actually have the life I want but I just must not be visualizing hard enough"

"They do generalize a bit, but they couldn't know each person's life story. I see how that could feel insulting though" Jackson replied, then paused like he was pondering something. "So which problems did you do the swoosh about?" He asked.

"Isn't that a bit personal?" Mark answered surprisedly.

"Yeah.. but can't a get to know you? We're going to be seeing a lot more of each other since my ankles messed up. It's not even that personal, here, I'll tell you mine".

" You really don't have to-".

But Jackson had already started.

"I want to be more successful so I can look after my family better, I want to have more energy. My mom is getting more frail and I want to do more to take care of her.  It would be nice to find somebody special, also. How about you?".

".. I'm sorry about you mom, I'm sure you'll be able to help somehow" Mark replied, a little surprised by his forwardness.

"I hope so" Jackson answered, with a seriousness that was unfamiliar. "Anyway, which problems did you pick?"

Marks hand sent to rub the back of his own neck reflexively. "So.. I guess it was mostly about being at Geode, about.. wanting a relationship and.. myself, I guess".

" Yourself?" Jackson asked curiously.

"I don't know, there a just some things I wish were different, it's not a big deal".

" Like what kind of things?".

"Like.. I'm not very confident, well, I am, but only around specific people. That's kind of the problem, that I don't feel like I can be myself around a lot of people". He noticed himself picking at the bark again.

" Why is that?" Jackson asked with sympathetic eyes.

" I just don't feel comfortable, I guess" Mark answered, staring off at the group doing low ropes. "You ask a lot of questions" Mark said with a giggle, realizing that he had just shared quite a lot with him.

"People have told me that before" Jackson replied, joining Mark in watching the low ropes.

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

The group finished up doing their low ropes course and Jaebum sent Hani over to inform Mark and Jackson that the activity was over. They walked back to the other campers, but instead of immediately parting when they had the chance, they continued their conversation while Jaebum lead them back through the forest. Even though the sun was setting it didn't feel much colder. If anything it felt like it had become much more humid, which made them sweat as they walked.

"There you are" Yugyeom said as he caught up to the pair. He had a vague look of surprise. "Hey Jackson".

" Hey".

"How was it?" Asked Mark.

"The low ropes? Way too easy, I don't need a spotter to help me walk over a balancing beam. But beside that it was ok" Yugyeom answered. "How about you guys? Weren't too bored?".

" We weren't bored. It's probably the most I've ever heard Mark talk though" Jackson said, giving Mark a friendly glance.

Yugyeom laughed. "Yeah, don't let that quiet act trick you, he can actually talk".

Mark felt awkward being discussed, but he made no effort to stop them.

 

 

They made it out of the woods and were taken to Patience Hall earlier than usual. Just as they walked in the doors Amber appeared at Jackson's side, wanting to take him aside to ask him about something. Mark and Yugyeom continued over to the line without him.

Mark noticed the extra charming smile Yugyeom flashed Jimin and the way that he asked him how he was instead of just thanking him for the food, but Mark didn't feel the need to mention it.

They walked over to their usual corner table. "This looks really good" Mark said as he set down his tray. He looked over his shoulder to make sure Jackson was ok getting his food, but Amber was helping him.

"Yeah" Agreed Yugyeom with an absentness to his voice. They began eating silently until Yugyeom added "Hey, do you think Jimin likes me?".

" Uh.. Well he doesn't really know you much does he?" Mark said surprisedly.

"He does know me, we talked for like half an hour last night. Besides, did you see the look he gave me?".

" I can't say I did" Mark answered honestly, since he had only looked at how Yugyeom looked at him. "Why don't you ask him?".

" I couldn't do that" Yugyeom dismissed. "What if he says no?".

" It's not like you would be stuck with him at the office, when camp is over you would never have to see him".

"I guess" Said Yugyeom unconvincedly.

Mark didn't know why he would advise people to be much more bold than he himself ever would be, he just did.

A familiar voice interrupted the discussion.

"Hey, is it ok if I join you guys?" Asked Jackson, who was standing by the table with Amber holding his tray.

Mark looked to Yugyeom, obviously surprised. Yugyeom gave him a nod then Mark answered "Yeah, of course".

He leaned his crutches against the table and slid into a chair. Amber put the food down for him then excused herself. " Awesome. So what were you guys talking about?" Jackson asked.

"Nothing really. So, you usually sit with Youngjae, Hani, Hakyeon and Amber, don't you?" Yugyeom asked, quickly changing the subject.

"So far yeah, but I wanted to switch it up a bit. People are way too stuck in their cliques, they're missing out on this opportunity this camp gives us to get to know the team members we wouldn't normally have the chance to".

" Do we count as a clique?" Yugyeom asked playfully.

"I guess, you are a two person group. Why don't you guys sit with the others more?" Jackson asked, it was clear that this was more out of curiosity than out of jugement.

Yugyeom shrugged. "Don't know.. Would just rather not".

" It's easier to talk without everybody else" Mark added.

"Ah ok" Jackson replied. It was obvious he didn't relate, but he at least tried to understand. Mark appreciated that. Then Jackson looked noticeably less smiley, like something bad had just occurred to him. "Would you rather I left you guys be? I don't have to intrude if you don't want me to".

" No no, it's fine" Mark reassured, putting his hand on Jacksons on the table. "Really. You aren't everybody else".

Jackson smiled, looking into his eyes. Mark felt him move his thumb slowly over his hand, seemingly without noticing. Then Jackson pulled his hand away. " Ok, but you have to promise me you'll tell me if I get annoying".

"Ok" Mark said quietly, feeling kind of weird and fluttery.

"Promise" Jackson demanded jokingly.

"We promise" Yugyeom said through a grin.

 

 

After they finished dinner Jackson returned to his own friend group, not wanting them to feel unloved. Mark and Yugyeom remained at their table chatting until the Hall was getting noticeably emptier. They stood up and put their trays and dirty plates away.

"Hey, wanna check our warm Fuzzies bags?" Yugyeom asked jokingly as they went to leave.

"I really doubt we would have anything else yet.. but sure".

They walked over to the wall and checked the bags.

" Nothing, you?" Said Yugyeom.

"Uh" Mark said, surprised to feel something that seemed like a note. He pulled it out. "You are interesting and insightful" He read.

"What?" Let me see" Yugyeom said, snatching the note.

Mark felt like he was blushing but he really hoped that it wasn't noticeable. It was definitely a weird reaction.

"Who is this from?".

" I don't know" Mark lied.

Yugyeom leaned in, a mischievous smile on his face. "Is it from Jackson?".

" Don't know.. Could be?.." Mark said, fixing the hair of his fringe, probably trying to cover his face which was now definitely blushing.

Yugyeom laughed. "Weird. Only he would actually take this thing seriously" He said, seeming to drop the subject.

"Hey, Jimin's there" Mark observed, looking over his shoulder. Jimin was wiping down the tables.

Yugyeom looked over discreetly. "So?".

" Why don't you ask him to talk to you later?".

Yugyeom seemed to contemplate this, then he stopped and grabbed a note and a pen from the small table next to the warm fuzzy display. He began to write.

"What are you doing?".

Yugyeom didn't answer, he just kept writing. Then, he walked over to the bag labelled Jimin. " Hey Jimin" He said, catching his attention. Then he put the note in the bag very obviously.

"Let's go" Yugyeom said to Mark in a quiet but excited voice. They walked out of the hall but Yugyeom was sure to give Jimin a friendly smile, since he looked noticeably confused. "Read the note" He said, then they were gone.

 

 

Yugyeom told Mark that the note was asking Jimin to meet him behind Patience Hall after everybody was asleep if he wanted to catch up again. That way if he wasn't interested, he was unlikely to come anyway he figured. Mark was surprised but impressed that he was actually going through with this.

They wandered around until Mark got tired and they decided to go to their separate tents. Though, Yugyeom would be getting up again later.

Mark found Jackson in the tent, already asleep, he entered carefully. He discreetly got changed into his pajamas next to him then laid down, pulling some of Jackson's sheet over himself. When he lifted up the sheet he noticed that Jackson wasn't wearing a shirt, which seemed like a completely sensible thing with how hot and humid it was. He looked good, really good. Mark quickly turned to lay the other way rather than stare at him. He closed his eyes and drifted off.

 

 

Just like the night before, Mark woke up to arms around him, though it wasn't night, it looked like it was morning outside the tent. It felt more intense than before, partly since without a shirt there was even less between their bodies, just the thin fabric of Mark's tank top. His face seemed to snuggle closer to the back of Mark's neck, with his lips lightly brushing against it. It gave Mark shivers in a way that he didn't want.

He didn't like the way that his body was betraying him, reacting to the breath against his neck and the warm touch of his hands. He could deny seeing Jackson that way all he wanted, but he couldn't deny that he could feel himself getting hard. That was something that was hard to ignore.

He felt like he was being punished. Of all people why did he have to be sharing a tent with literally the only person at Geode that he found attractive. The only person who he had.. confusing feelings for.

He tried to distract himself with anything, but it wasn't happening. Then Jackson's hands clumsily began travelling along Mark's torso and that was the last straw. He moved himself over sharply, caring more about getting out of that situation than about not waking Jackson up.

He looked over his shoulder at Jackson waking up confusedly.

"Huh?.. Oh.. sorry" Jackson said when he realized what he must have done. "I should have warned you I can be a sleep hugger".

" It's ok" Mark replied meekly. He wasn't going to stop facing away from Jackson until the stiffness in his pants went down. His pajama shorts would have made it overly obvious.

"Do you wanna get breakfast or something?" Jackson said, sitting up. His hand went to rub the back of his neck.

"You go ahead, I'm not ready to get up just yet" Mark said tiredly, hoping that it would excuse him.

"Ok sure, see you there" Jackson replied, going to unzip the tent.

"Hey, is your leg feeling any better?" Mark asked.

Jackson paused and moved his ankle. "Actually yeah, it does hurt a lot less. It still isn't fixed though".

Then Mark remembered that Jackson would likely need his help getting his food. " Hey wait, I'll come with you, just let me get changed" He suggested.

Jackson agreed and left the tent and waited while Mark changed into more suitable clothes. Jackson was just going to get changed when he showered.

Mark sighed while he reached for his grey shorts and a black t-shirt. He could feel himself acknowledging his situation, his feelings, even though he didn't want to.

Jackson was the crush he had happily gotten over and would have remained over if Jackson didn't go and be so lovely that it made Mark embarrassed at himself for ever saying anything negative about him. Or the way he was making him want him so bad without even trying.

This wasn't meant to happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm sorry about the weird ship with Yugyeom and Jimin, I hope you don't hate it. It is pretty much just a result of my bad planning and not making Bambam the chef instead. But oh well, it will have to do.


	8. Chapter 8

The realization of his feelings for Jackson was dizzying and Mark needed to get away for a bit to collect himself. He decided to shower before breakfast since it would likely be his only chance to be alone.

There were facilities at the back of the hall which had shower stalls. There weren't many so it could be hard to get a turn, but fortunately there was a free stall for both him and Jackson.

Mark let the warm water wash over his body while he tried to relax, but that wasn't going to happen.

This was really bad.

Even if Jackson somehow did end up liking him back, no matter how unlikely that scenario was, Mark would never want to risk going through what he went through with Jinyoung again. He would also never want to subject Jackson to what Jinyoung went through. Especially with how much being at Geode matters to him.

This idea wasn't even worth entertaining though because why would Jackson like him back? What reasons had he given him, compared to all the things Jackson did which made Mark like him. There was also the very large chance that he was straight.

Mark went over all the little things like how much effort Jackson put into getting to know him, the way he would radiate positivity while Mark was pretty much the opposite. Mark felt like he didn't measure up.

He decided that he just needed to file his feelings away to deal with after camp. These kinds of things were hard to manage while sharing a tent with the person he wants to get over. He just needed to remember that they are only friends, at most, and it would never be anything more.

He needed to be able act normal if he was going to be unable to avoid him.

 

 After his shower Mark got his breakfast and went to sit with Yugyeom.

"Hey, how's it going?" Mark said tiredly.

"Good.." Yugyeom said through a grin which Mark barely observed. He lowered his eyebrows impatiently, like he was waiting for Mark to ask an obvious question. But he didn't, he just started eating. "So I made out with Jimin" Yugyeom blurted out.

"What?" Mark exclaimed quietly, looking up at his friend sharply. "You're serious?"

"Yeah, it happened" Yugyeom replied proudly.

Mark took a moment to respond, he was not expecting that outcome. "Are you going to see him again?".

"Well I had an idea, if you're interested".

" If I'm interested?" Mark said confusedly. Then Mark noticed that Jackson was out of the shower and nobody was around who would offer to help him get his food. "Sorry, I'll be back in a minute, I need to help Jackson" Mark said as he stood up. "But you should tell me when I get back". Yugyeom nodded.

 

 

 

But he never did get to tell him because Jackson, just like at dinner, asked if he could sit with Yugyeom and Mark. So finding out would just have to wait.

After they finished Jaebum arrived, telling them that they were going to do an activity  with both him an Moonbyul which he named vertical path to success. But unlike Moonbyul's other activities, this required them to go into the woods.

The group stared at the object in front of them after arriving. Moonbyul had lead them through the woods to a clearing which contained it. The object was like a string of Radom junk, secured to a rope and suspended from a bar in the treetops. There was a chair, a tire, a big inflatable ball, like somebody had cleaned out their storage shed and decided to make a camp activity out of the random items.

" So, this is the vertical path to success, an activity both me and Jaebum like to coordinate. The objective is to climb to the top of the path. You will be attached to a harness though so you won't get hurt if you don't make it". Moonbyul explained.

"I'm hoping to see some real teamwork here, you will need to support your camp buddy if they have any difficulty. Also, the rest of your team will be helping to hold the harness pulley system which will involve putting your trust to your team" Jaebum added.

While Moonbyul helped get a camper into the harness, Jaebum turned his attention to Mark and Jackson.

"Hey Jackson, feeling any better?".

" It hurts less than it did" Jackson commented, looking at his ankle.

"That's good. I just wanted to check if Mark wanted to do this activity. If you wanted another try at a trust activity, this is your chance. You don't have to of course, but I saw that was something you seemed to struggle with".

Mark almost said no automatically, but then he considered that it would mean he would be alone with Jackson less. A part of him was looking forward to it, but that was the part of him that he was trying to squash down.

" ok, I'll do it" Mark replied, catching the surprise on Jackson's face. "Is that ok, you won't be too bored will you?" He checked.

Jackson quickly changed his expression to happy and encouraging. "No, you should totally try it, don't let me stop you".

" I also suggested that you do this activity since people have to wait in line to have a go, so Jackson can just be with the other campers while he waits". Jaebum added.

 

 

 

Being with the entire team while they waited for Mark's turn was a big difference from the intimacy of their conversations at the last activity. Jackson still talked, just about nothing particularly unusual or personal. Mark felt pangs of regret for choosing to miss out on what could be the last chance he would have to have conversations like that with him. But he knew it was for the best, he knew if he had let himself, his feelings would only grow deeper.

"Hey Mark, you want to go?" Jaebum asked.

Mark nodded and stood up, he walked over to Moonbyul to be put into the harness. 

"You're all secure" Moonbyul said as she tightened a buckle. "You can go when you're ready".

Mark looked over at the ropes that were supporting him, being held by Jaebum and most of the Geode team. He took a few deep breaths and went to start climbing.

It wasn't difficult, just awkward, as he put his weight on the wooden platform attached to the bottom of the rope, it caused the entire rope to swing sideways. He clung to the rope tightly. It was equal parts difficult because of the height and because of the nature of the vertical path, never quite knowing which part he is supposed to grab or put his feet on.

The vertical path to success got distinctly more difficult around half way. He paused unsure of how he was supposed to proceed.

"You'll be ok Mark, you can trust your team to catch you if you don't succeed" Jaebum yelled. "Isn't that right?".

The others holding the rope responded with things like " Yeah" and "Go Mark".

This made Mark look down at the people supporting his harness. He had forgotten that this was supposed to be about trusting those people. He was entirely focused on the task at hand and it had efficiently distracted him until that point. Then he saw Jackson and the way he looked up at him proudly. It made Mark completely freeze.

" You can do it, this activity is all about not letting negative emotions get in the way of you achieving success. You can always find a way to get what you want, to get to the top of the path to success, there has to be a way for you to keep climbing. Just focus on showing yourself you can do it" Moonbyul said calmly.

Mark knew that Moonbyul's nonsense was the last thing he needed and evidently, so did Jackson.

"Are you alright Mark?" Jackson yelled out.

He knew who that was without looking down. "Yeah.." He said uneasily.

"You know, you don't have to do this for any of the reasons they tell you. You chose to do this activity for you. It doesn't have to be about a path to success if that's isn't your thing. You being Mark Tuan climbing a rope is enough. Just finishing is an accomplishment". Then he turned to Moonbyul and apologized, hoping to have not offended her, but Moonbyul and Jaebum seemed to accept that Jackson was just being a good camp buddy.

" Thanks" Mark said quietly and Jackson smiled back at him.

He wasn't entirely correct though, Mark had not done this activity for himself. He had done it to avoid the growing feelings he had for Jackson, but apparently he couldn't avoid that anywhere.

He felt like a mess and he hated how he was so inept that everybody was forced to coax and encourage him, especially Jackson. The other campers had become better and handling challenges, but not Mark. He also didn't like how he was the person who got to do these things, not Jackson who actually wanted to, instead he had to sit and watch Mark waste his opportunity.

"There is a spot you could grab onto on the handle of that case" Jackson told him, which reminded Mark where he was.

He looked above him and saw where Jackson was referring to, he grabbed it and swung his leg, hooking into the hoop above him. He felt suddenly optimistic, like there was a chance he could actually make it to the top.

"Go Mark" Cheered Yugyeom.

He kept his momentum going, pulling himself up the rope structure until eventually he was looking down at the team from the top. He could feel adrenaline surging through him but he felt satisfied. He did it and he did it for himself.

"You can choose if you would rather climb down or jump off and trust your team to let you down gently"" Jaebum said.

Barely even processing the words, Mark jumped before he had the chance to convince himself against it. The other campers carefully released the rope pulley, lowering Mark to the ground gently.

After Moonbyul helped him out of his harness, Jackson walked over and wrapped a tight hug around him.

"You did really well" He said proudly.

"Thanks for encouraging me" Mark said, unable to stop smiling.

His arms didn't want to let go and the adrenaline was distracting him from doing so. Jackson seemed to notice when he tried to end the hug. Though Mark stopped as soon as he realized what he was doing. Jackson had a confused look in his eye when he looked at Mark after they pulled away, it was brief but painful to see. Mark reminded himself that he needed to act normal.

 

 

 

The group went to lunch and Jackson opted to sit with Mark and Yugyeom, which they were getting used to.

They talked about various topics, though Mark was slightly bothered that he hadn't had the chance to ask Yugyeom what he meant about him and Jimin. There would have to be a chance eventually.

"Hey, I'm just going to the toilets" Mark said, standing from the table.

They gave him a nod and continued their conversation. Mark left and Jackson followed him with his eyes, waiting until he was completely gone.

"Hey Yugyeom, can I ask you something?" Jackson said unsurely.

"Yeah?".

" You're Mark's best friend, right?".

"Yeah.." Yugyeom replied, trying to gather what this could be about.

Jackson hesitated, more uncomfortable than Yugyeom had seen him before. "It just.. Has Mark said anything about me?".

Yugyeom's eyed widened slightly at the unexpected question. " Uh.. He's mentioned you, if that's what you mean.." Replied Yugyeom, unsure of how he was supposed to answer.

"But like, nothing out of the ordinary?".

" No, why?" Asked Yugyeom.

"No, reason. Just forget I asked" Jackson said in a tone like he was trying to smooth over their interaction and make it no big deal.


	9. Chapter 9

After lunch an activity with Moonbyul was scheduled. The campers had to find a comfortable spot on the grass with their partner and take turns talking about themselves for two minutes straight. It was much easier than the activity they did when they were originally told about the camp buddy system, where the topic was what they liked about themselves. This version was broader, there was more space to talk about anything from their favorite color as a child to what kind of music they like.

The activity went smoothly with very little difficulty. Mark felt that he had become comfortable enough around Jackson that it wasn't a difficult or even vaguely unpleasant task. The hardest part was the glimpses of tension he felt in the pit of his stomach when there was a pause or when Jackson smiled at him a certain way, like it was all going to come crashing down.

He tried to not let himself entertain ideas that would only make him sad, and he succeeded for the most part.

After the activity Moonbyul told the group to sit in a circle.

"How did everybody go? Did anybody have anything they wanted to share? Did anybody have any issues?" She asked the campers.

The main consensus seemed to be that nobody had any problems. Many campers mentioned even enjoying it.

She was glad of the outcome and told the group about how this was the main reason she wanted them to do such an activity, to show the group how much more comfortable they are with each other and how much they have grown at the camp. She was obviously proud by the look on her face.

She encouraged the group to share their experiences at the camp. This ended up dragging on until the light was starting to dim. It was oddly nice though, in Mark's opinion. It seemed like it was the most honesty the group had shown at the camp. The atmosphere of this discussion felt different to others that Moonbyul or Jaebum had facilitated. It was like they were gradually leaving work mode, focusing less on the fact that their boss is listening and feeling more able to discuss their camp experience. Somehow the genuineness of Moonbyul's speech about how far they had come had an effect on the group.

Nothing was required of Mark, just to sit back and listen, which he had no problem with. From the people who did chose to share, he got told stories of overcoming challenges, of complete discomfort and some unlikely new friendships. Nobody's camp experience was the same as anybody else's.

Though Mark felt no urge to share himself, he found it odd that Jackson didn't either. He would comment on other peoples stories, but did not share anything of his own. Mostly he just listened, like Mark did. It struck him as being slightly out of character.

 

 

They went to Patience Hall for dinner and as was pretty much expected by now, Jackson was eating with Mark and Yugyeom.

After they had finished eating Hani and Amber came to the table, playfully asking if they could steal Jackson. Yugyeom and Mark let him go and stood up to walk their plates over to the kitchen. Seeing a glimpse of Jimin's orange hair prompted Mark to remember how Yugyeom was going to tell him what he meant before, about how he was supposed to help with him somehow with seeing Jimin.

The Hall was getting relatively empty compared to how it was earlier and the people who were left were obviously distracted.

"So what were you going to tell me before? About you seeing Jimin and that involving me for some reason?" Mark asked quietly.

"I'll tell you when we get out of the hall, I just have to do something" Yugyeom said, turning towards the warm fuzzy bag wall. Mark was confused, but he didn't question it.

"Just have to write him a note~" Yugyeom said cheerily.

Mark stood and stared at the wall, noticing the way that each bag is decorated in a way that vaguely reflects the owner. Then Jackson's caught his eye, with it's big block letters and bright suns carefully colored with felt pen. He felt like it was such a fitting contrast to his own gloomy bag, with nothing more than the word Mark written hurriedly with blue pen.

It occurred to him that for all the compliments that Jackson had given him, he had never given him any back, at least not using the warm fuzzy bag system.

He wrote down something while Yugyeom was distracted with his own note. Yugyeom glanced up as Mark slid the note into his bag.

"So, writing a note for Jackson, huh?" Yugyeom said as he put his own note in the bag labelled Jimin.

"Yeah. So? I'm being nice" Mark said as they turned to leave, coming off more defensive than he had intended.

"Anything you want to tell me about?" He said knowingly.

"No, why?".

" No reason" Yugyeom said with a playful grin.

"No really, what?" Mark asked as they stepped out.

Yugyeom paused, seemingly to drag out Mark's suffering. "Jackson seemed a bit curious about you, that's all".

" What? How?" Mark demanded.

Yugyeom laughed, which made Mark feel way more embarrassed than he would like. "He asked me if you had said anything about him, he seemed really uncomfortable about asking too" He said with a shrug.

"Oh no oh no" Mark mumbled quietly, staring at the dusty ground.

"What's this Oh No stuff? There must really be something I'm missing".

Mark continued walking silently, clearly troubled. Yugyeom briefly humoured him before stopping and putting a hand on his upper arm. " Mark, talk to me". His eyes widened slightly when he noticed that Mark was shaking.

Mark sighed and looked up at the eyes of his friend, which were surprisingly serious. He took a deep breath. "Jackson must know that I like him and he was asking you to find out for sure". He said before averting his gaze.

" You like Jackson?" Yugyeom said surprisedly.

"Yes" Mark said, unable to find anything else to say. He waited for a jokey remark but it didn't come, and instead he felt Yugyeom's hand lightly rub his arm reassuringly.

"Hey, it's ok, pretty sure most people would develop feelings if they had to share a tent with and do all this weird emotional stuff with somebody they used to crush over. You're only human". Yugyeom leaned his face down, like he was trying to get Mark to look at him instead of the floor. "Damn Youngjae and his big ideas".

This made Mark smile, but only slightly. " It's all Youngjae's fault" Mark said, he wasn't being serious, but somehow blaming this on Youngjae, for putting him in this bizarre situation, seemed like the thing to do in the moment.

They had a very brief giggle at their boss's expense then the mood turned serious again.

"What am I going to do Yugyeom?" Mark asked sadly. "What if he tells everybody, what if everybody hates me like they did after they found out about Jinyoung?".

Yugyeom hugged him. " I really doubt he would tell everybody" He reassured.

"I can't go through that again" Mark said, with a tone like he was stopping himself from crying. Yugyeom held him tighter.

"You won't have to, I'll talk to him if I have to".

Mark didn't know what Yugyeom talking to him would accomplish, but the sentiment was nice, that his friend would protect him no matter what. He let himself be held for a moment more then let go, feeling slightly calmer.

" You're right though, he doesn't seem like he would just go and tell everybody, does he?" He asked, looking for reassurance.

Yugyeom shook his head. "Very unlikely".

" I just hope he isn't really uncomfortable with sharing the tent with me. But he seemed really normal earlier?".

"It'll be fine, he didn't seem uncomfortable around you. He's never seemed homophobic either. You know, it's weird but before I knew the full story I assumed that he was asking because he liked you or because something had happened between you two".

" Why?" Mark asked curiously.

"I don't know, just the vibe I got I guess. Hey, you never know, it could be right".

" very doubtful".

There was a silence until Yugyeom made a suggestion. "You should talk to him about it".

Mark sighed. " I will if I have to. I guess" He said reluctantly. "Just to make sure he understands that he has the power to ruin my life if he tells anybody".

" He won't tell anybody, I bet it will be fine" Yugyeom reassured, even though he had know way of knowing this was true.

"Oh no".

His friend looked at him questioningly. " What?".

"That note. If he suspects I like him that note would just make it more obvious".

" What did you write?" Yugyeom asked as he was led back into the hall by Mark.

"Just compliments, but I need to get rid of it".

They approached the wall of warm fuzzy bags. The hall was empty except for Jimin and Xiumin who were busy cleaning. Mark dug his hand in to find that Jackson's bag was empty.

" He must have already emptied it" He said defeatedly. Yugyeom patted him on the back.

"If he already knew your note won't make any difference".

"I guess" Mark replied, with any life drained from his voice.

 

 

Yugyeom stayed by Mark's side and they wandered around the camp grounds talking. Yugyeom told him about what his note to Jimin. Apparently Yugyeom had invited him to come sneak out and swim in the lake with them later that night. Mark was shocked that he would plan something like this without even asking him if he actually wanted it, but Yugyeom reminded Mark how at the beggining of camp he had indeed agreed with Yugyeom's idea to sneak out and go swimming at some stage. He explained that it is more like them doing the thing they had already planned to do, he just happened to also invite Jimin.

Mark was too tired to protest, and his life felt like such a mess that he didn't really care. If anything it would be sort of nice to have a distraction since he doubted he would be able to sleep anyway.

They made plans to sneak out and meet at a specific time after everybody else was asleep.

"You guys are gonna need to get some sleep if you don't want to be tired" Commented Youngjae, noticing that they were the only other pair who weren't in their tent.

"Yeah we were just about to go" Yugyeom replied, giving Mark a look.

"Us too" Replied Youngjae with a good natured smile as himself and Hakyeon stood up. "Goodnight".

They said goodnight to him then walked away.

" See you a bit later" Yugyeom said before they parted.

Mark unzipped the tent delicately, considering that there was quite a large chance Jackson was already asleep.

To his surprise Jackson was laying there completely awake.

"Hey Mark".

" Hey, you're up late".

"Yeah, still not used to sleeping in a tent I guess".

He climbed inside and took his shoes off, then crawled over to his spot and laid down, even though he knew he wasn't going to sleep. An idea occurred to him that Jackson could be feeling uncomfortable sharing a tent with him, and that was why he couldn't sleep. He reminded himself that Jackson hadn't shown himself to be like that and attempted to ignore it. He concluded he was probably being irrational. It reminded him just how much dealing with homophobia at work had messed him up.

" What do you and Yugyeom even do in the evening?" Asked Jackson, his slightly confused tone acknowledging that Mark had come to the tent much later than normal.

"Wander around, talk, that kind of thing, guess we lose track of time".

"Ah ok.. you're not avoiding me are you?" Jackson checked playfully.

"No, no" Mark reassured. He wondered if this was his cue to talk to Jackson about the last subject he would ever want to talk to him about.

He didn't know if Jackson was purposely giving him a chance to bring it up or if he was just being playful, and just happened to say something that related very strongly to Mark's current concerns.

"Why would I avoid you?" Mark asked, if only to test the waters and try to get any information he could from his reaction.

"I don't know" Jackson replied. Mark watched him, seeing if he was going to say anything more. He both hoped he would and dreaded it. Because part of him, as bad as it would be, just wanted the uncertainty to be over. Part of him wanted to hurry up and get his talk with Jackson over with. However it seemed that Jackson had nothing more to add.

Jackson filled the silence with small talk, which let Mark feel some sense of normalness between them. Though, he grew more and more aware that it was getting closer to when he was supposed to meet Yugyeom and Jackson wasn't asleep yet.

Then Jackson turned more of his body to face Mark. "Hey, could I talk to you about something?".

This was it. Mark tried to remind himself that this was good, if Jackson did know, it would definitely be better to talk about it like adults.

"Sure.. What is it?" He replied hesitantly.

Jackson paused, like he was trying to find the right words but struggling to come up with anything. Mark watched him with dread, it felt like the wait dragged on and on. "It's just.. How do you deal with everybody knowing? And knowing that some of them will never accept you?".

" What?".

"You know, about you being gay.. or bi..".

Mark was shocked that he wasn't being confronted about his feelings and was instead being asked this. He was surprised by Jackson's interest in the topic, but he tried to answer honestly, though his heart was racing from anticipating a very different question from him.

"Believe me, if I was given the choice I'd rather they didn't know. Everybody finding out was because of a mistake, not because I felt confident or comfortable with it".

" I know, but you still seem like you cope with it better than I would" Then he quickly added to his sentence. "If I was in your situation".

" Thanks.. I just keep to myself mostly, that's how I deal with it".

"You shouldn't have to do that though, nobody should. We can't be a proper team if people discriminate against their own team members" Jackson said indignantly.

It made Mark smile slightly. It was kind of cute that he was getting fired up about Mark's problems. He liked that Jackson's values about work and being a team even extended to issues like the homophobia at Geode. Especially considering how some people just don't care to acknowledge it.

"Could I tell you something? You have to promise to never tell anybody, not even Yugyeom".8

" Yes?" Answered Mark unsurely.

"No, you have to promise" Jackson said with more seriousness than Mark was used to.

"Ok, I promise". Mark watched him as he breathed in, facing the roof of the tent and brushing hair back with his fingers. " I've only ever told Amber this before.." He said, stalling. "I'm pretty sure I'm not exactly straight. Well, I'm pretty certain I'm bi actually".

Mark was caught off guard by this confession, he didn't know what to make of it, he felt like he had barely processed the words. " Really?" He asked surprisedly.

"Yeah. I've never done anything with I guy, so I guess I can't be 100 percent sure but I'm 80 percent sure".

" It's not like you need to do anything to be certain. I knew before I had ever been with a guy".

"Really? How did you know?".

Mark shrugged. " How do straight people who have never been with anybody of the same gender know they're straight?".

Jackson paused, considering what Mark had said.

"I'm just saying, if you are pretty sure you're bi, you probably are".

" I guess so.." Jackson concluded. There was a silence after that, which Mark struggled to come up with the words to fill. He looked over to Jackson who seemed like he was thinking about what to say next as well as he stared at the tent ceiling.

Mark moved his gaze to the shiny ceiling fabric as well, not wanting to seem like he was staring at him in such a vulnerable moment. Mark was in slight disbelief at what had just happened, especially considering that just before he was sure that he was going to be confronted about his crush on him. What did this mean? Why did Jackson choose to tell him this? His mind raced with possibilities but he tried to stop it from getting too out of hand. There was a large chance that Jackson could have just chosen to tell him because he already knew Mark wasn't straight and wouldn't judge. Though, he also felt like it wasn't entirely impossible that Jackson was telling him for a different reason. He wasn't sure if he was just being hopeful.

"So you haven't told anybody else?" Mark asked, if only to end the silence.

"Only Amber, and now you" He replied with a small but timid smile at the end of his sentance.

Mark watched that smile quickly vanish and his expression change to confusion as footsteps rustled the dry grass surrounding the tent. It seemed like they were standing right next to them.

"Psst Mark, are you coming?" Yugyeom's voice whispered loudly.

Jackson immediately looked to Mark, confusion on his face. "What's this about?".

Mark wanted to hit Yugyeom over how impatient he could be. " Just a moment" Mark replied to his friend outside the tent, then turned back to Jackson. "I.. Yugyeom wanted me to go night swimming in the lake. I said I'd sneak out with him and go tonight" He said truthfully.

"Sneak out?". Jackson gave him a questioning look.

" Yeah. I.. Sorry, I just expected you'd be asleep and I shouldn't have agreed anyway it was a bad idea" Mark trailed off nervously.

"And you didn't invite me?" Jackson interrupted.

"You would want to come?" Mark asked surprisedly.

"Why wouldn't I? It's not like I've gotten to do many exciting things at camp" He replied with a gesturing glance to his leg.

"Oh yeah.. Would you even be able to swim with your ankle?".

"I don't see why not. I wouldn't be putting any weight on it".

"Um.. Ok.. Um" Mark said glancing over his shoulder and wondering how Yugyeom would react to the idea of Jackson coming with. He couldn't help the smile that was forming on his face and the fact that he felt at least somewhat excited at the idea of doing anything with him. Particularly because he had just told him he was bi, so he didn't feel the same urgency he did before to bury any feelings he had for him. "So you really want to come?" Mark checked, he was now sitting up and resting on his knees.

"Yeah, I'm down" He replied.

"Just wait here, i'll have to check with Yugyeom".

Jackson nodded and Mark crawled out of the tent and immedietly saw his friend, who was looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

" So, I heard most of that.." Yugyeom began.

"You did? How much?".

" The you inviting Jackson part? What, was there more?"

"No, that was it.."

" Yeah, just.." Yugyeom stopped and motioned for Mark to walk further away from the tent. They moved far enough that they wouldn't be overheard. "Have you forgotten I'm going to be with Jimin?" He finished.

"Oh yeah..". Mark rubbed the back of his neck. He had overlooked that detail. It was too bad he couldn't just tell him that Jackson wouldn't care that he's bi since he is as well, but unfortunately that wasn't his information to give. "What do we do? He already know's we're going and really wants to come. It'd be weird to just tell him he can't".

"I know" Yugyeom said stressedly. "Did you talk to him about.. You know".

" No, not yet.. sort of went to a similar topic, about being gay and how I cope with everybody at work knowing".

"Yeah?".

" Yeah. He seems cool about it, like, if you did let him come I can vouch that he won't be awful about it".

Yugyeom sighed. "Fine he can come, I just won't be able to kiss Jimin" he said dissapointedly.

"Thank you" Mark said sympathetically before hurrying to the tent to grab Jackson.

 

 

 

Yugyeom recoiled as he dipped his toe in the cool water of the lake.

" Is it cold?" Mark asked as he removed his sneakers. The water in front of him looked black and uninviting.

"Sort of, but it'll be fine after we're used to it".

" Yeah, this is nothing" Jackson said as he felt the water with his fingertips. He stood back up and removed his shirt. Mark caught himself staring, then removed his own. Then Jackson jumped into the lake with a splash.

"Be careful" Mark said, but to nobody in particular since Jackson was underwater. He watched him come to the surface, the way his hair messily covered his eyes was cute, he slicked it back with his hand.

"Are you guys coming?" Jackson asked impatiently.

"Yeah" Yugyeom said eagerly, quickly lowering himself into the lake and cringing from the temperature change. "Mark, come on" He coaxed after he swam over next to Jackson.

Mark was cold just from the water that had splashed against him, his skin was forming goosebumps. He knew it would be better to just get it over with, so without warning he jumped into the lake, making water splash over the others. Mark came up to the surface and shook the hair off his face. Yugyeom looked vaguely annoyed at him for splashing him, but Jackson was just smiling at him. "So, where's Jimin?".

" He'll be here.. Hopefully" Yugyeom answered.

"Who's Jimin?" Jackson asked.

"A chef who works here" Yugyeom answered as he swam, slightly further away. "I've been making friends with him, there is a chance he might come see us".

" Really? Cool, I barely know any of the staff here" Jackson answered. "Isn't it sort of risking his job though?".

"Sort of but we're pretty unlikely to get caught.. Unless you snitch on us" Yugyeom said in a playful but serious tone.

"He wouldn't do that" Said Mark.

"Does that look like him?" Yugyeom asked, abruptly changing the subject. They looked off at the man approaching the lake.

"I hope it is" Mark said cautiously.

The man waved, which let them relax a bit. "Yugyeom?" The man asked hushedly.

Yugyeom swam over to the lakes edge. "Hey, I'm glad you came" He said with a huge smile.

"I hope I don't get caught" Jimin said, looking over his shoulder. "I can't believe I'm doing this" He said with a giggle that let his face soften.

"You'll be fine, trust me".

Jimin's eyes searched the others. " So, which of you is Mark?".

"I'm Mark".

" And his friend Jackson is here as well" Yugyeom added.

"Hey guys, I'm Jimin, nice to meet you properly" He said, then removed his shirt and sneakers. "Is it cold?".

"No, come on in" Jackson replied.

Shortly after they settled into the water, Mark noticed Yugyeom whisper to Jimin, presumably about how they would have to be less touchy around Jackson, luckily, Jackson was distracted or else he would have wanted to know what they were whispering about.

They swam and joked around and had fun in the lake. Jackson was especially proud of himself for managing to not scream when a piece of seaweed wrapped around his leg, feeling suspiciously like a slimy eel. Instead he just made a quiet whining noise, which only Mark noticed. Mark was the person who had to remove it, because Jackson couldn't bring himself to touch it. He still felt proud for not screaming though.

He hugged Mark after he got rid of it and said thank you. Mark didn't even know what he was meant to feel about Jackson anymore, he was such a confusing swirl of emotions, which definitely amplified when Jackson hugged him wet and shirtless. Mark tried to not look flustered, but the weird thing was he didn't feel as obligated to act normal as he did before. Part of him was really wondering where Jackson's touchy friendliness ends and him flirting begins. Since him telling him that he's bi the lines seemed less clear than previously believed.

"Hey Yugyeom~".

"Yeah?".

"I still have your phone in my cabin, do you want to come on a walk with me to get it?" Jimin asked.

"Uh.. Yeah, totally, just uh.." Yugyeom looked over to Mark and Jackson. "I'm gonna go with Jimin to get my phone, he was charging it for me. You guys will be fine, right?".

" Will you be back?" Mark asked, fully aware that Yugyeom had his phone at dinner.

"Not sure". He glanced at Jimin.

" It's getting late, you guys should probably be get some sleep soon" Jimin said. "I'm getting too tired to swim more".

" Yeah, we have activities tomorrow morning" Jackson said to Mark.

"Do you want to go to bed?" Mark asked.

Jackson nodded. "Unless you want to stay?".

Mark shook his head. " It's getting colder".

"Seeya" Yugyeom said as he and Jimin were about to leave.

"Bye, see you at breakfast" Jimin added and they left.

Mark swam over to the edge of the lake and pulled himself out. He handed a towel to Jackson as he did the same. The dried their hair as best as they could and then draped the towels around their shoulders for warmth.

The walk back to the tent was less than ideal. The night air was icy against their damp skin and their cold wet swimming pants clung to their legs.

Things felt more awkward after Yugyeom left, reminding Mark that this had happened right in the middle of a serious and deeply personal conversation, which Jackson had made no attempt to bring up.

"Have you ever seen the stars like this?" Jackson asked, making Mark look up at the cloudless night sky.

"Only when I was little" He replied. He hadn't noticed before just how many stars were visible, it was beautiful.

"I'd never seen anything like this before camp".

" If only you had your phone, you could take a photo".

Jackson shook his head. "I don't need a photo to remember this".

They continued walking until they finally reached the tent and climbed inside.

"I'm so cold! Why did I let Yugyeom convince me to do that?" Mark said, shivering, changing into dry pajama pants as modestly as possible.

"Because it was fun?" Jackson replied with a smile, also shivering.

Mark waited for Jackson to get changed before sliding under the sheets.

"Hey, do you want to unzip our sleeping bags so we can share them? It would be like having two blankets" Jackson suggested.

"Sure, if you're ok with that" Mark replied, unsure if he shouldn't feel the excitement he feels in his chest.

They unzipped the sleeping bags and layered them as he said, then they both slide underneath. It felt perfect against Mark's chilled skin, the thick fabric traps the heat and doesn't let it go. Even so, he found himself curling into a ball, attempting to warm his limbs. Jackson snuggled closer.

"It's so cold" Jackson said, a shiver in his voice.

Mark realized that Jackson's face wasn't that far from his. His eyes darted to his lips, which had a vaguely abnormal tint from how cold he is. He forced his eyes to look somewhere else.

"It probably isn't even cold, it's probably just because we swam in a lake then walked through the wind in wet clothes at two am" Mark replied.

"Probably" Jackson agreed, not shivering any less. Mark wanted to hold him, but he figured that would be weird.

There was a silence and the both wriggled slightly to get warm and comfortable, still settling very close, with parts of their body touching, but only lightly.

"Hey, you know how before I was talking about.. You know.."

"Yeah?" Mark asked curiously.

Jackson paused. "What's it like being with a guy?".

" It's.. Different but the same. I've only been with a girl when I was a teenager though, and I wasn't into her so it's not that much to compare to. Not all guys are the same though..". Jackson waited for him to continue, Mark attempted to come up with more to say then gave up and giggled uncomfortably. "I don't know, it's a hard question to answer".

Jackson giggled as well, slightly embarrassed. " Sorry". He didn't make Mark explain further.

Mark could feel warmth flushing his face, talking about these things with him was still intense, no matter how much he tried to be normal about it. Then he felt Jackson's eyes on him.

"Are you blushing?" Jackson asked playfully, his eyes widening.

"No" Mark replied sharply, turning his face away.

"Yes you are" Jackson teased. "Hey, it's ok" he said, putting a hand on Mark's face to make him turn it back towards him.

Jackson's fingertips were still cold against his burning cheeks, it gave him chills. Jackson smiled amusedly as he removed his hand from his face.

"Do you just like asking questions like this to embarrass me?" Mark asked jokingly.

"Possibly.." Jackson replied then paused. Mark tried to let himself breathe.

"Do you like anybody?" Asked Jackson.

"Now you're really doing this on purpose" Mark joked over his discomfort. He should have known this was coming.

Jackson laughed. "No, seriously".

"Yeah.. I do.." Mark replied, searching his eyes. He knew Jackson was waiting for him to elaborate but he couldn't bring himself to.

"So~" He said interestedly. "Who is it?".

Mark had just before planned to tell him, but now that he was so cornered, he was less keen on the idea.

"Come on, I told you a secret" Jackson pleaded, nudging him under the blankets.

"I really can't though" Mark said uneasily.

"Why?".

He was failing to come up with a reason, because he was failing to even think properly. He felt too shy to look at Jackson in the eyes, but as his gaze lowered he saw his mouth turn into a knowing smile. He was unsure if Jackson could completely see through him or if he just expected it so much that it seemed that way.

Jackson gave Mark slightly more personal space, backing off from him. " So there's nothing going on between you and this person?" He asked.

"No" Mark answered.

"Because I had an idea.. Only if you want to though".

" What is it?".

"I was wondering, since I've never done anything with a guy before, could I kiss you?".

Whatever Mark was expecting, it wasn't that.

" I know you said that I can know without doing anything but it really bothers me not feeling like I can know myself for certain" He explained.

"So it would be like an experiment?" Mark asked, managing to seem much calmer than he felt.

"Kind of? That sounds bad, I'm sorry just-".

" No, it's ok, I understand just wanting to know. Are you sure you want to do this though? You would have to see me at work. It wouldn't make it too weird for you?".

Jackson shook his head. "Would it for you?".

"It's just a kiss" Mark said and attempted to make himself believe. He wanted to kiss him and the chance was being dangled right in front of him, it was the only thing he could see.

"You're really ok with it?" Jackson checked, edging slightly closer.

Mark nodded. "Yeah". He couldn't believe this was actually happening. His heart was racing.

Jackson laid his face right next to Mark's before closing his eyes, Mark closed his as well as he felt Jackson's lips press lightly onto his. It was slightly awkward to begin with because Mark was unsure of what kind of kiss Jackson actually wanted, he decided to be cautious and let Jackson lead the intensity of the kiss.

His lips felt warm and soft as they moved against his, delicately pushing his mouth more open, showing that he was ok for the kiss to be deeper. It wasn't just kissing him that was getting to Mark, it was being this close, though he knew he couldn't touch him. Still, the fact that he could feel his heat and somehow he smelled good, even though they both smelled like lake water, he was having an effect on him.

The pace of the kiss lessened and Jackson pulled away, leaving Mark with his lips slightly parted, breathing heavily.

"..Thank you.." Jackson said, through vaguely uneaven breaths.

"..no problem" Mark replied, aware of how awkward this was. "Did you find out what you wanted to know?".

Jackson looked like he was contemplating. Mark hoped it wasn't that kissing him was bad. " I liked it.. Do you think that liking kissing a guy means I'm definitely bi?".

" I can't decide that for you" Mark answered. "I guess if it seems like the sort of thing you could see yourself doing again then, yeah probably".

Jackson nodded, like he was weighing up the information. He was still laying his head on the same pillow as Mark, barely even further away than when they were kissing. " Would you want to do it again?" Jackson asked, his dark eyes lowering to Mark's lips like they were tempting him.

A smile crept onto Mark's lips and he found himself initiating another kiss, as an answer to his question. He wouldn't normally be so bold but he wanted it so much he wasn't thinking clearly, he was still swept up in the moment. Jackson didn't stop him, instead he put his hand on Mark's shoulder and let him kiss just as deeply as before.

Mark didn't want it to end and it was showing no signs of it. Yet for some reasson he kept anticipating Jackson pulling away at any moment, that this would be the most he would get to experience of him. This made him want to savor the taste of his lips even more.

He could feel himself getting hard as Jackson's breathing got heavier. Just knowing that it was because of him turned him on. Jackson's hand moved from his shoulder to lightly cup his face as he teased his toungue inside Mark's mouth.

Distracted by his tongue, Mark didn't notice that Jackson's hand had started traveling down his body until it rested on his waist, he wondered if it would be ok for him to touch him too, but he didn't want to do anything unwanted. Jackson exhaled heavily again, giving Mark chills and arousal coursing through his body. He wondered just how far Jackson wanted to go.

He put his hand on Jackson's shoulder and impulsively pulled him closer, closing any distance between them. He realized that Jackson would have felt how hard he was through his flimsy pajama pants, he didn't seem put off by this, luckily.

Then Jackson reached down and started rubbing Mark though his pants, which made Mark stop kissing him from how shocked he was, his breath hitched.

"Is this ok?" Jackson asked, still feeling his erection through the fabric. His hand moved so that his fingertips were inside the waistband, indicating what he would like permission to do.

Mark knew this was a bad idea, he wanted it with every nerve in his body, but it was still a bad idea. They were at work, basically, even if it was a camp, they were surrounded by sleeping coworkers. Yet, none of this could stop Mark from giving in to what his body wanted and saying yes.

Jackson freed Mark's erection from his pants and began stroking it slowly with his hand. They had stopped kissing, almost like it would have been too much on top of this. His strokes were slow and cautious, like he didn't want to do something wrong, but Mark didn't care, he was so turned on by him that any type of touch would feel good.

Mark let out a sound that would have sounded like a moan if he wasn't trying so hard to keep himself quiet. He felt vaguely self conscious, and couldn't quite make eye contact with Jackson, who from the way he was looking at him was much less shy than he was.

From the sound of Jackson's breathing and the lust in his eyes he had nothing to be embarrassed about and he was just as into this as he was.

The hand on his cock picked up pace. Mark put his hand on Jackson's hip and grabbed tightly, like he needed to hold onto something. Mark was having trouble being as silent as he intended to be, even his own heavy breathing made him concerned about the other campers finding out. He unintentionally let out another soft sound which made Jackson press his lips onto his, letting him moan into the kiss.

Jackson would moan as well in response, though much softer, like he was just getting off on the effect he could have on Mark.

"Can I touch you as well?" Mark asked breathily, moving his hand closer to Jackson's hardness.

"Yeah" Jackson whispered.

He reached his hand into Jackson's pants, feeling how hard he was, it was still difficult for him to believe that he really had permission to do this, then he pulled his cock out and started stroking it. Mark was close, but he tried to focus on Jackson and making him feel good.

Jackson kissed him roughly as Mark felt him get harder in his hand.

After it became obvious that Mark was close, Jackson pulled back, like he wanted to watch him. Mark was so swept up with arousal that he couldn't bring himself to feel self conscious like before. The only things he could focus on was the feeling on wanting release and how beautiful Jackson looked when he was breathless and staring at him with dark eyes and flushed lips.

He pumped faster and Mark came hard, harder than he would have ever expected from just a hand job. Jackson's hand stroked him until he was finished, kissing his lips softly.

Mark realized that his hand on Jackson's cock had slowed since he was distracted by his own orgasm. He shifted so Jackson rolled onto his back and Mark laid at his side, kissing his neck while he stroked his cock.

He could feel him getting harder, he looked up and saw that Jackson was biting his lip, trying to keep quiet. He got closer and closer as Mark increased the pace and eventually he could tell he was about to come. Mark leaned over him, kissing him roughly as he jerked him through his orgasm. Jackson's hand gripped at him firmly as he came, showing Mark a glimpse of how intense it was. Then after he was done, Mark kissed him then laid on his back next to him, them both catching their breath.

"Yeah, I'm definitely bi" Jackson finally said.

Mark laughed.

"Glad I could help, I guess".

They cleaned themselves up without talking much. Mark felt unsure about what had just happened but also not quite ready to ask either. He knew the idea of kissing him was an experiment, but when he kissed him again, and everything that fo.llowed, that didn't feel like an experiment.

They decided to at least attempt to get some sleep before activities. Mark managed to doze off quickly, not knowing that Jackson was definitely not going to be able to sleep, and would instead spend what was left of the night staring at the tent ceiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaa yikes I'm so inexperienced at writing smut and I'm sorry this is a mess. Hope you like it anyway.


	10. Chapter 10

Mark woke up and saw Jackson fast asleep beside him, looking beautiful in a disheveld kind of way. He filled with shock as he remembered the events of last night. Jackson's lips and his body and..

That actually really happened. Mark was unsure of what to do about this information.

He leaned over to check his watch for the time, it was getting late, they needed to get going if they wanted any breakfast.

"Hey Jackson," Mark said softly. He got no response so he lightly grabbed Jackson's shoulder. "Hey, you need to get up". Jackson rolled over and groaned.

Mark laughed. " Come on, it's not that early".

Jackson blinked his eyes open and sat up reluctantly. It seemed like he was struggling to keep them from closing.

"You ok?" Mark asked, he was genuinely concerned that Jackson had gotten sick from the lake water and the coldness. His face had less life than normal and the dark coloring under his eyes was very noticeable.

"Yeah, I just didn't sleep much last night" Jackson answered with a slightly croaky just woke up voice.

"..Why's that?" Mark asked uneasily.

Jackson turned and gave him a small reassuring smile. "Mustn't be used to sleeping in a tent yet. You would have thought I would've adjusted by now".

" That must be annoying," Mark replied.

"Yeah, anyway we should get ready" Jackson said, grabbing a change of clothes.

They got dressed and walked to the hall, Jackson filled the entire walk with rambling about variety shows he liked to watch. Mark liked the idea of Jackson telling him any small things about himself, but he got the sense that his camp partner was just trying to make sure that things were normal between them by not allowing any awkward silences. Even if the silence wasn't awkward from Mark's perspective.

"Finally" Yugyeom announced impatiently as they approach the table where he was sitting alone. His pout quickly turned to a grin, indicating he wasn't actually serious. "Hey guys".

"Hey, we just have to get food" Mark replied, walking by with Jackson to the line. They returned just shortly after with trays of food.

"So, how did you go last night?" Mark asked, knowing that his friend couldn't actually tell him any of the details he wanted to know.

"It was good, really good" Yugyeom said with a smile, Mark knew from the way he basfully looked down at his plate that something had happened, but he would have to wait to know more.

"How did you even get to be friends with a camp chef anyway?" Jackson asked curiously.

Yugyeom told him about how he had ran into him late at night and how they had ended up talking quite a lot, he just left out the non platonic parts.

They continued talking and Mark mostly sat back and listened. It seemed nice that they had gotten more comfortable with each other. He just couldn't shake the vibe though, that Jackson was over compensating, trying to convince Yugyeom also that nothing had changed. Perhaps Mark was just feeling this way because he felt slightly left out of the conversation. It's not like he was being excluded, just that every silence was filled with Jackson asking Yugyeom another question. His attention seemed very focused on Yugyeom, and Mark was used to it being on him. The dynamic of the camp buddy system had over indulged him in that regard.

The idea that Mark was jealous of Yugyeom occurred to him, but that didn't feel likely. He was never a jealous person. Something about Jackson just seemed a bit off. However, he knew that a bit of weirdness would be pretty normal and to be expected. He just hoped that it wasn't anything worse.

Mark was surprised at how well he himself was handling what had happened. He had decided to compartmentalize the event as something that wouldn't happen again, though he was secretly hopeful, he had to admit. Just, he had no idea if Jackson had been attracted by him specifically or just the idea of doing things with another man.

Still, somehow this felt easier than worrying about having a crush on a straight guy who was going to tell everybody at work about it. At least he felt a bit more entitled to non platonic feelings about him after this.

"Hey, how are you guys going? Ready for a big day?" Asked Jaebum, who had walked up to their table.

"Yes, we're going orienteering right?" Replied Jackson with his usual enthusiasm.

"After lunch, you have an activity with Moonbyul next though, it's on your schedules".

" I had been meaning to find you to ask if I still need my crutches" Jackson added.

"Really? Has it been feeling much better?" Jaebum asked.

"Yeah definitely i woke up today and it's only a slight dull pain if I put my weight on it".

"Really?" Mark asked, feeling happy for him but surprised he hadn't mentioned it. Though, he was so busy talking about other things that it made sense.

"It looks like the swelling has gone away, if you aren't in pain then I'd say you're healed up" Jaebum said, checking the ankle. "Just go easy".

Jackson glanced at Mark with his cutest smile of child like joy, then turned it quickly to Jaebum. " So I can do activities like normal?".

"How about you give orienteering a go and see how you feel".

"Ok" Jackson said enthusiastically.

"I hope you both are as pumped about today as he is" Jaebum said.

"We are" Mark and Yugyeom said unconvincingly. Jaebum chuckled good naturedly and left.

 

 

Then Yugyeom excused himself to go shower and they were left alone at the table.

"So, it's great you don't need crutches anymore".

" Yeah, I'm so glad it healed up before camp was over".

Mark looked into Jackson's uneasy eyes as they paused.

Jackson quickly made conversation about pets they had at home. While Mark would normally like this conversation, it was obvious why he was doing it. Mark humoured him, politely answering his questions, but the more he watched Jackson struggle to fill every moment with chatter, the more he could see.

Jackson was actually terrified.

Mark felt like he couldn't just watch him suffer anymore.

"Hey Jackson?".

" Yeah?".

"Could we talk outside for a moment?".

He could tell that Jackson knew what it would be about.

" Sure" Jackson replied, standing up. Mark was quite sure that he was making him do something that he didn't want to do, but he wasn't making it obvious.

They walked outside and behind the hall.

"I just.." Mark hoped he would be able to find the words. "I want to make sure that things don't get weird between us. Because of what happened. You seemed a bit different today".

"I know.. I'm sorry" Jackson said, rubbing the back of his neck and looking down.

"This is going to be way easier if we can actually talk to each other about it" Mark suggested, surprised at how forward he was managing to be. Yugyeom would be proud.

"I feel really bad about what happened.. Last night".

" What do you feel bad about? Do you regret it, or-".

"No.. I don't know". Jacksons shoulders slumped and he moved to lean against the building next to Mark. He looked at Mark with a tiny smile that looked sort of sad. " I guess I don't regret it. I just don't think I could do it again". He sighed tensely, looking even sadder. "I'm sorry I led you on. I know.. well I assumed you liked me from that note that was really obviously from you in my warm fuzzies bag".

" Damn those warm fuzzies, exposing me like that" Mark joked, attempting to lighten the mood, despite the growing sinking feeling in his stomach.

Jackson didn't smile.

"I didn't expect you to do it again. If that helps" Mark said as he drowned the part of him that believed and hoped otherwise. "I assumed it was pretty likely it was just experimenting anyway, since that's what the kiss was".

" No, you don't get it. I like you Mark, I really do" He said indignantly, it shocked Mark. "but I wouldn't cope with the sort of things you've been through. I'm sorry I messed you around, I really thought I would be ok with it. But even without anybody knowing I still laid awake all night, thinking of if somebody found out. if everybody, my friends, turned against me".

Mark wanted to comfort him and tell him that this was unlikely, but he knew better than anybody that it was a definite possibility. He couldn't even feel happy about Jackson telling him that he liked him. Instead he just felt sorry for him.

"It's ok, I understand".

" I'm so sorry Mark, i-".

"It's fine, really" Mark said. "You'll still be my friend though right? If we're gonna be camp buddies I feel like it's better for both of us. And you know, I like being friends with you".

" Of course", Jackson replied, like a weight was lifted off his shoulders.

Mark looked at him, a part of him felt miserable, but he knew this was how it had to be.

"Hey, you guys just ditched me" Said Yugyeom as he spotted them. Mark and Jackson walked over to him, knowing they would need to act like nothing substantial had occurred. If they could.


End file.
